Oogogo nomntana bakho bangaba ngabantwana abanokuthenjwa kakhulu. Kodwa ngamanye amaxesha xa unyoko okanye utata wakho enyamekela umntwana wakho kubangela imiba yengqondo kunye neengxaki. Ukucaca okucacileyo kule mijelo emihlanu ukukhusela xa ootatomkhulu bebazali .
Ukubekiweyo Ukulindela nayiphi na iMigaqo yoMgaqo
Ngamanye amaxesha kunzima ukubeka umthetho kunye nabazali bakho.
Kodwa ukuthetha ekuqaleni kweseshoni yokufumana umntwana okanye kwinqanaba lokunyamekela umntwana rhoqo liya kuqinisekisa impumelelo yalo. Kungcono ukwabelana ngendlela ofuna ukuba umntwana wakho anakekele ngayo kunokuzisola ukuba awuzange.
Ugogo nomkhulu kufuneka bazi ukuba abantwana bakho badinga ukulala nokulala, kwaye nawuphi na umyalelo osapho lwakho olulandela nje ukuba ubukele i-TV, ixesha lokutya ukutya, ukuphuma apho kwaye ufanele uqeqesho. Ngokomzekelo, ukuba ootatomkhulu bahlala bexela ukuba i-kiddo yakho inqunywe iinwele zayo, soloko ithi "akukho zicukulo ezinwele" ngaphambi kokuba ushiye abantwana.
Ungabhala kwakhona izinto ozilindeleyo. Ootatomkhulu abanakho ukulandela yonke imithetho yakho, kuba, ngaba ootatomkhulu. Ngoko uzama ukunciphisa imithetho yakho kwizinto ozivakalelwa kakhulu okanye eziphathelele ukhuseleko. Izikhokelo ezininzi ziya kuba nzima kubazali nogogo ukuba bakhumbule. Awufuni ukuba bazive ngathi awuthembeli isigwebo sabo.
Ukuba Unzima Kakhulu NgeMithetho Yakho
Ngoku ukuba ubeke imigaqo ethile, kuya kufuneka ufunde ixesha lokuvumela izinto zihambe. Njengabaphi ubudlelwane, kuya kufuneka ube nokholo lokuba ootatomkhulu baya kuhlonipha imida yakho yomzali kwaye baya kuphila ngokulindelekileyo.
Ukuba ufika ekhaya kwaye iingubo zezingane zihlaziyi okanye iimathoyizi zafakwa kwindawo engafanelekanga, cinga kabini ngaphambi kokuthetha.
Kungenxa yokuba ootatomkhulu nootatomkhulu bayayinyamekela abantwana bakho okanye ikhaya lakho ngokungafaniyo akuthethi ukuba bayiphutha. Zama ukuthatha umoya omkhulu kwaye ukhumbule indlela onombulelo ngayo ukuba oogogo nomkhulu bahlala beza kunceda.
Ukuba uwela kule ngcambu kunokubangela ukuba oogogo nomkhulu bakugxeke uze ukhangele abantwana bakho bangaba mnandi kubo. Awufuni ukuthukuthela ootatomkhulu kakhulu ukuba kufuneka uhlasele ukuze ufumane unyango olutsha .
Ukuba abantwana bahlala kwindlu yomkhulu kufuneka balandele imithetho yomkhulu. Unogogo nomkhulu wenza umsebenzi ophakamisa wena okanye wakho umlingane, akunjalo? Ngoko benokholo lokuba baya kuhlonipha iinqwenela zakho kwaye babe nobutyebi. Ukwenza oko kufundisa abantwana bakho ukuba bahloniphe abadala babo.
Nquma ukuba Uya kubahlawula okanye Hayi
Ngaphambi kokuzonwabisa, amaxesha okufumana abantwana aqala ukucinga ngokuzibophezela kwabazali bakho okanye abasemthethweni. Ukuba ulungisa iindleko zabantu bonke kwaye ufike kwisivumelwano malunga nezinto uza kuzigcina kwiingxaki kamva. Phendula imibuzo efana noyo uya kuhlawula umkhulu-nkulu ukunyamekela umntwana? Ngubani na oya kulungelelanisa imisebenzi kwaye ahlawule iiklasi okanye ukuphuma?
Ukuba bebukele umntwana wakho imihla ngemihla, ukuhlawula kubeka ubudlelwane kwinqanaba elithile lobugcisa kwaye uxinzelele ukuba oku kuzinikela okukhulu.
Yiloo nto oyifunayo xa usebenza ngelixa oogogo nomkhulu bafunda. Ukuchithwa kwemizuzu yokugqibela kungaphazamisa umsebenzi wakho - kwaye kukho ezinye iindlela zokugcina imali.
Ngakolunye uhlangothi, khumbula ukuxubusha impembelelo yemali yokuhlawula ugogo nomkhulu kubafundi bebantwana, njengokuba kufuneka uhlawule irhafu yerhafu. Kungenza kube nengqiqo ukuba uhlawule ukutya, igesi, ukuphuma okanye ikhefu kunokukhupha imali.
Njengengxenye yale ngxoxo, unokuxoxa ngeentsuku zokugula kunye nokukhansela. Ukubonakalisa ngaphambi kwexesha ukuba unika isaziso esingakanani kwisiganeko sokukhansela? Yintoni eya kwenzeka xa wakho umntwana okanye ugogo nomkhulu ugula?
Ukuphikisana nootatomkhulu oPhambili kwaBantwana
Abazali bethu bayazi ukuba baqhube njani amaqhosha ethu kuba bafake. Kwaye ngamanye amaxesha singaphantsi kwesikhumba. Kodwa into yokugqibela oyifunayo kukuba ubeke abantwana bakho phakathi kweminyaka emininzi yokulwa nombane kunye nonina.
Ngoko xa usebenzisana nogogo nomkhulu njengabantwana, baphathe ngendlela oya kubaphatha ngayo umntu omdala onoxanduva lokunyamekela abantwana bakho. Oko kuthetha ukuba akukho ukuhlambalaza okanye ukuhlamba kwaye akukho zikhokelo kwiingxoxo ezidlulileyo. Gweba izivakalisi eziqalayo, "Uhlala uhlala ..." okanye "Awuze ..." okanye "Ndiyayithiya xa u ...".
Ukuba unobunzima obunzima nomzali (okanye umzala-mzala) unokufuna ukucinga kwakhona usebenzisa loo mntu njengomnakekeli. Kungenzeka kube nzima kakhulu.
Ukulibala ukuyigcina kwi-Loop
Abazali bakho kunye nabazali-mkhwenkwe bakho banokwazi abantwana bakho kakuhle. Kodwa abantwana bayashintsha ngokukhawuleza, kwaye kunokuba nzima ukuqhubeka xa ungahlali nabo.
Ngaphambi kokuba uhambe ukuze ufike ootatomkhulu ugqirha nantoni na enokuchaphazela isimo sengqondo somntwana okanye impilo yakho. Oku kubandakanya izinto ezinjengeenkathazo zokulala okanye iimpawu zentsholongwane ebandayo. Okanye mhlawumbi badla isidlo okanye ukutya. Ootatomkhulu abanokuthi bangenakunxibelelana phakathi komntwana onqabileyo kunye nolambileyo. Batshele malunga naluphi na ukwesaba okutshanje ngokutsha, njengezinja, imisindo ephakamileyo okanye amabali athile. Ukuba umntwana wakho ube nexesha elithethileyo ukuba ubazise malunga nokuqala kokuxhalabisa . Futhi ungayikhohlwa imiba yesikolo okanye umntakwabo osondeleyo okwenzeka ngoku kutshanje ukuze bafumane ngokukhawuleza ukuguquka kwemizwelo.
Ehlelwe nguElizabeth McGrory