Abazali abaqhelekanga ukufuna ukwenza iimpazamo. Ngokusoloko kunjalo, baxhomekeke kuphela 'kwiimvelo zabo zabazali' kwaye abazami ukufumana uncedo ngemicimbi eqhelekileyo yomzali kunye neengxaki. Ngelishwa, abaninzi bethu abakwaziyo ukukwazi ukuba benze ntoni kwiimeko nganye esijamelana nabo njengabazali, kwaye sonke sinokuzenza iimpazamo ngezikhathi ezithile.
Ukufunda ukunqoba ezi zi-7 eziqhelekileyo iimpazamo zabazali kuza kukufumana indlela ende ekujoliseni ekubeni ngumzali onempumelelo:
1) Ukuzama ukulungisa iiNgxaki
Kungenxa yokuba becinga ukuba iingxaki ezithile azikwazi ukuzinza okanye zikhawuleza ukuba zamkele, abazali abaninzi banyamezela iinyanga okanye iminyaka yokukhungatheka eziphila neengxaki eziqhelekileyo. Oku kunokubandakanya iimfazwe zokulala , ukuvuswa kwamaxesha amaninzi, okanye ukuvutha komsindo kunye neengxaki zokuziphatha kubantwana abadala.
Nangona kungathatha umsebenzi onzima, ezininzi iingxaki ojamelana nazo njengomzali zinokusetyenziswa kwaye zitshintshile okanye zitshintshile. Unokufuna uncedo nangona kunjalo. Ingane yakho ayinakuza kunye nemiyalelo, kodwa kukho ezininzi zeencwadi, iiwebhusayithi kunye nabantu, ezinokukunceda ekukhokeleni kwimingeni yomzali. Udokotela wezilwanyana kunye nabanye abaqeqeshi bezempilo banokukunceda xa bejamelene neengxaki ezinzima okanye eziqhubekayo.
2) Ukugqithisa okanye ukujongana neengxaki
Ngaphambi kokuba uzame ukulungisa iingxaki, kufuneka uqaphele okokuqala kwaye akuyona ingxaki.
Kwaye ukuba kuyinkathazo, lukhulu kangakanani ingxaki ojongene nayo.
Ngaba ingxaki enkulu ukuba yakho:
- Isikolo sokufunda esikolweni singamaxesha amaninzi?
- U-5 okanye oneminyaka engama-6 ubudala 'ubanjwe' edlala udokotela?
- Umntwana uqala ukuvavanya umda wakhe, uchitha ixesha elingakumbi kwintsapho yakhe, okanye uzama ukuzimela ngaphezulu?
Ngokubanzi, impendulo kuzo zonke iimeko zintathu ayikho.
Le miba elula efanelekileyo ilindeleke. Ngakolunye uhlangothi, akufanele uthathe kalula ingxaki efana nentombazana ebanjelwe ukutshaya, ukuba okanye ukukopela.
3) Ukuba neelindelo ezingalindelekanga
Ukuba unelindelo ezingenangqiqo malunga noko abantwana bakho kufuneka bayenze, unokwenene udala iingxaki. Oku kwenzeka rhoqo xa abazali bekhungathekile okanye bephelelwa ngumonde kunye no-2/2 ubudala oneminyaka engama-2 ubudala ongenalo umdla ekuqeqesheni ubumbanyo, oneminyaka engama-6 ubudala onokumisa umbhede, okanye umntwana osemva. Ngoko qiniseka ukuba okulindelekileyo ukulingana noko abantwana bakho abakwaziyo ukuphuhliswa okanye ukuba kulindeleke ukuba benze.
4) Ukungahambelani
Zimbalwa izinto ezinokulimaza abantwana bakho ngaphezu kwesitayela somzali esingavumelaniyo. Ukuba ngamanye amaxesha unzima kakhulu, kodwa unika ngamanye amaxesha okanye ubonakala ungakhathaleli oko abantwana bakho abakwenzayo, baya kuba nexesha elinzima ukuqonda oko kulindeleke kubo nokuba benze njani.
5) Ukungabi nemithetho okanye ukubeka imida
Unokucinga ukuba wenza abantwana bakho inceba ngokubavumela ukuba benze nantoni na eyifunayo, kodwa abantwana bancinci bakuthola kunzima ukuhlala ngaphandle kwemida. Ukuba nemithetho, ukubeka imida, imiqathango eqhubekayo, kunye nokukhetha okukhethiweyo kuya kunceda umntwana wakho azi kwaye ulindele oko kuza kulo lonke usuku.
6) Ukulwa kwakhona
Kule ncwadi, Ukubeka Umlinganiselo Ngomntwana Wakho Okhuselekileyo , uDkt. Robert MacKenzie uchaza ukulwa kwakhona 'njengomdaniso wentsapho,' apho 'unamathela kule ndlela yokuthintana.' Asikhulumi ngokulwa nomntwana wakho, kodwa ukulwa emva kunokuthatha ezinye iifom, njengokutshatyalaliswa, ukukhala, nokuziphinda ngokuphindaphindiweyo.
Ukulwa okanye ukuphikisana nezingane zakho kubanika ingqwalasela embi kwaye banamandla amaninzi phezu kwakho kuba banako ukuqala ukuphendula okunzulu okunjalo. Esikhundleni sokumisa iingxaki zengxaki, ukulwa kwakhona kuya kukukhokelela ekubeni 'ungazibongi ngokungazenzisiyo ukuziphatha kakubi ozama ukumisa.'
Esikhundleni sokulwa, ungenza ngcono ngokumisa imizabalazo yamandla nokufunda ubugcisa obunempumelelo, njengokwenza ixesha kunye nokusebenzisa iziphumo ezinengqiqo nangokwemvelo, kwaye ungabhubhisi ixesha elide ngaphambi kokuba usebenzise.
7) Ayitshintshi into engasebenziyo
Ukungaqapheli okanye ukuguqula ubuchule bakho bokubeletha obungasebenziyo bunzima kakhulu njengengxaki njengoko ungazami ukulungisa iingxaki kwindawo yokuqala. Nguwuphi na osebenzayo? Ngokomzekelo, usenokucinga ukuba ukutyunjwa kuyindlela efanelekileyo yokuqeqesha, kodwa ukuba kufuneka uyisebenzise imihla ngemihla ukulungisa ingxaki okanye ukuziphatha okufanayo, ngoko kuya kucaca ukuba ayikho. Okanye ukuba ixesha lakho lokulala libandakanya umntwana wakho avuke ngokuphindaphindiweyo kwaye ephuma embhedeni, welula ukuya kwiyure, kwaye ushiya udidekile kwaye umntwana wakho ukhathele ngentsasa elandelayo, kwaye mhlawumbi ufuna indlela entsha yokunceda umntwana wakho aye kulala.
Xoxa notitshala wakho wezilwanyana ukuba unengxaki ngalezi 7 iimpazamo eziqhelekileyo zabazali.