Ukuphonononga Izizathu Zabazali Banika Ukutywina Abantwana Babo
Ijelo sohlwayelwe kubantwana sihloko esivelisa ingxabano kunye neengxoxo. Nangona iingcali zempilo kunye nophuhliso lwezingane zibhekiselele kuphando olubonisa ukuba isijeziso senyama asiphumelelanga kwaye sibeka abantwana engozini kwimiphumo emibi, uphando lubonisa ukuba ukukhwabanisa kuqhutyelwa emakhaya amaninzi. Inani elinama-83 ekhulwini labantwana baseMelika baye bahlawulwa ngokwenyama ngabazali babo ngebanga lesihlanu, ngokutsho kukaLiz Gershoff, uPh.D.
, isazi senzululwazi yophuhliso kunye noprofesa onxulumene neSebe loPhuhliso loLuntu kunye neNzululwazi yentsapho kwiYunivesithi yaseTexas eAustin.
Kodwa kukho impawu yokuba baninzi abasuka kwinqanaba labantwana, utsho uVictor Vieth, uMlawuli oyiNtloko eMeritus kwiziko loQeqesho loKhuseleko lwaBantwana ku-Gundersen, eWinona, eMN. Uthi u-Vieth uthi: "Kukho umkhondo ocacileyo ngaphandle kokugwetywa. "Uluntu oluninzi olusekelwe elukholweni lusuka kulo."
Kubazali abaninzi, ukusebenzisa isohlwayo semoto kubantwana babo yinto abazijonga ngayo njengesigqibo somntu. Bayibona njengethuluzi elibalulekileyo, elisebenzayo, nelincedo ekufundiseni abantwana ukuba baziphathe njani, kwaye baninzi abakholelwa ukuba isijeziso somzimba siyakuziva ukuzikhusela xa isohlwayo senkohlakalo ibhalwe njengento engasebenziyo kwaye ingozi.
Kodwa kubazali emacaleni omabini enkulumompikiswano, ukubeka imvakalelo ecaleni-kunye naluphi na ukugxekwa okanye isigwebo-kwaye ukukhangela uphando mhlawumbi yindlela efanelekileyo.
"Kukho imfuno yangempela kweli lizwe ukuba ube nencoko malunga nesohlwayo esingumntu ongeyomvakalelo," kusho uVieth.
Isizathu Sokuba Abazali Baphelele Abantwana
Nazi ezinye zeengxoxo eziye zenziwa ngabo baxhasa isijeziso sonyango, kwaye yiyiphi inzululwazi yokuziphatha kwengane ithi:
1. Abazali bafumana isohlwayo sobuntu kwaye abayibukeli kakubi. Ukubetha abantwana kunye nokusebenzisa ezinye iintlobo zezijeziso zomzimba kuyingozi, kungekhona isiqinisekiso sokuba abantwana baya kuba neengxaki.
Kuchanekile ngakumbi ukujonga isijeziso somntu njengengxaki yokukhusela, uthi uDeborah Sendek, umlawuli weZiko loLuleko oluPheleleyo, inkqubo ye-Gundersen National Protection Training Centre, eyenza ukukhuthaza ukuqeqeshwa kwabantwana ngokufanelekileyo nokuphelisa zonke iinkampani uhlwaywa ngabantwana. Namhlanje, senze utshintsho oluninzi ukugcina abantwana nabadala bekhuselekile. I-Sendek ithi, "Kukho izinto ezininzi ezenzeke kwi-10 okanye kwiminyaka engama-20 edlulileyo engayenzayo namhlanje, njengokuba singasebenzisi izihlalo zeemoto okanye iinqwelo ze-bike. Kodwa namhlanje, andiyi kufaka umntwana ngebhayisikili ngaphandle kwesigqoko. Senze utshintsho. "
I-Sendek ibonisa ukuba abazali ababethelwa njengabantwana bangathanda ukujonga kakubi kumava abo. "Zibuze ngokunyanisekileyo ukuba uvakalelwa kukuba unobungozi kunye noyihlo okanye unina xa uhlaselwa," kuphakamisa i-Sendek. "Ngaba bekuyizinto ezikufundisayo isifundo okanye ngaba ingxoxo owaye nayo nabazali bakho nezinto omele uyenze ukuze wenze ukuziphatha okubi?"
2. Yindlela efanelekileyo yokufumana abantwana ukuba bavelele. Ukugxeka kungabinqanda abantwana kwilo xesha kodwa uphando lubonisa ukuba ekuhambeni kwexesha, intlungu kunye noloyiko lunokuthintela abantwana ukuba bafunde izifundo abazali abazama ukuzifundisa.
"Ukugxeka akufundisi abantwana ukuba baziphathe ngendlela abazali abafuna ngayo, kwaye banokuchaphazeleka," kusho uDkt. Gershoff. "Abantwana ababethayo bavame ukuthobela ngokukhawuleza, kodwa abazange bafundiswe ukuba bangcono njani kwixesha elide." Ukubetha akubafundisi ukuba kutheni ababenzileyo bekungalunganga okanye bafanele benze ntoni ngokuzayo, utsho uGr. Gershoff. Ifundisa abantwana ukuba baphephe njani ukubetha endaweni yokuba bancede bahlakulele izizathu ezintle zokuziphatha kakuhle.
3. Ukukhupha intonga kuphazamisa umntwana. Abanye abazali bakholelwa ngokunyanisekileyo ukuba abantwana abangenakuhlanjululwa baya kukhula baze baphuhliswe . Kodwa ngokukhangela nje izigidi zeempawu zokuziphatha kakuhle, ezinomusa , ezilungileyo kunye nabantwana abanomdla abangakaze bahlanjululwe kubonisa ukuba oku akunjalo.
Nangona ukuhluleka ukuqeqesha abantwana banokubangela ukuba abantwana baphuhliswe kwaye bangathandeki, bahlwaywe okanye bathe-kungenjalo. Indlela engcono kukuba uthathe umgangatho ophakathi, apho kukho ukudibanisa isiluleko esiqinileyo nesothando ngaphandle kwentlungu okanye ukwesaba ukutshiza.
Ngokuphathelele ingxabano engayisebenzisiyo isohlwayo esiya kubakhokelela ekuziphatheni okubi, i-Vieth ithi abantu abasentolongweni okanye abantwana abaphangaleleyo banokuthi bathathwe ngokukodwa xa bengekho ngaphezu kwezingane ezithobelayo okanye abadala ukuphula umthetho.
3. Akukho nto isebenzayo. "Akukho nto isebenza ngaso sonke isikhathi," kusho i-Sendek. Ukuhlaya akusebenzi ngaso sonke isikhathi; Ngenye indlela, umzali uza kushayelwa kanye kwaye angaphinda aphinde akhuphe, uthumela i-Sendek. Ukuzali kuba malunga nokuzimelela, kwaye ukunika abantwana imiphumo engokoqobo, njengokuthatha iTV, ixesha lekhomputha, okanye imidlalo yevidiyo kwiveki okanye nokuba nezingane zenza imisebenzi eyongezelelweyo yokungaziphathi kakuhle okanye ukuphula imithetho.
Ukuba umntwana wakho unenkinga yokuziphatha okanye yokufunda, kubaluleke kakhulu ukuba angabetha, uthi iTekekek. "Abanye abantwana bayabetha ngakumbi ngenxa yokuba banobudlova okanye banenkathazo yokulawula ukuziphatha kwabo," utshilo i-Sendek. "Kubaluleke nakakhulu ukuba aba bantwana baziphathe ngokuzimeleyo baze bangafunde ukubetha xa kukho ingxaki." "Abantwana abaneengxaki zokuziphatha banokuthi bangene phantsi kwesikhumba sakho," utshilo uVieth. "Kukho izifundo ezithi ziyakwazi ukuhlaselwa."
Naluphi na icala lempikiswano okhoyo kuyo, funda ngesigwebo somntu kunye nempembelelo yaso kwiintsana, kwaye ufunde malunga neengcali ezithethayo zezizathu zokuba kutheni abantwana bengasebenzi. Ukuba usebenzisa isijeziso somntu, zibuze le mibuzo ebalulekileyo:
- Ngaba iyasebenza?
- Ngaba iyasebenza ngakumbi kunezinye iindlela?
- Ziyiphi imiphumo yesikhathi eside?
"Asitsho ukuba abantwana abayidingi ukuqeqeshwa, uthi uViet." Kodwa kufanele kubekho ukhokelo olufanelekileyo. "
> Imithombo:
> Gershoff, uLiz. U dliwano. Matshi 2014.
> Knox M. Ekubetheni Abantwana: Ukuhlaziywa kweNkohlakalo yokuLawula eMelika. Umbhalo weNkcazo yeMpilo yezeMpilo . 2010; 24 (2): 103-107. i-doi: 10.1016 / j.pedhc.2009.03.001.
> I-Sendek, Deborah. U dliwano. Matshi, 2014.
> Udla, Victor. U dliwano. Matshi 2014.