Imihla ngemihla kunye nezenzo ezinokunceda abantwana ukuba babe ngabantu abalungileyo
Abazali abaninzi bagxininisa ibakala labantwana babo kunye nemisebenzi yangaphandle, njengokuqinisekisa ukuba abantwana bafundela, benze umsebenzi wabo wesikolo, baze bafike kwiqonga lebhola okanye izifundo zokudanisa ezilungiselelwe kunye nexesha. Kodwa kaninzi, sikhohlwa ukubeka ixesha kunye nomgudu ekukhuliseni elinye iqela lokuphumelela komntwana nophuhliso-olubaluleke kakhulu, kwaye mhlawumbi lubaluleke ngakumbi, kunamabakala amahle, amabhaso kunye namagosa -kuba ngumntu olungileyo .
Ngamhlanje "mna, mna," kunye "Ndifanele ukuba ngoku" kuluntu, kunokuba lula ukulibala ukubaluleka kokuchasana nale miyalezo ephazamisayo yokunyaniseka ngokukhawuleza, ukuzithengisa, nokuzingca. Ukuba sifuna ukukhulisa abantwana abanenkampani enomdla kunye nabantu abanomdla ngokwenene, sinokukunceda ekukhokeleni abantwana bethu kwimikhwa nokuziphatha okukhuthaza iimpawu ezintle ezifana nobubele, ububele, novelwano kulabo abangenalutho okanye abafuna uncedo.
Njengoko i-CS Lewis yatsho ngokugqithiseleyo, "Ukunyaniseka kwenza into efanelekileyo, nangona kungekho mntu ukhangeleyo." Sinokunyusa njani umntwana olungileyo, oya kwenza into efanelekileyo, nangona kungekho mntu angababona bekwenza, kwaye xa akukho mvuzo? Nangona kungekho ndlela eqinisekisiweyo (ukuba kuphela!), Nali ezinye iindlela abazali abangakha ngayo udidi olufanelekileyo kwaye bancede umntwana akhule abe ngumntu olungileyo.
Indlela Ongakhulisa Ngayo Abantwana Bakho Ukuze Babe Abantu Abalungileyo
- Yenza uvelwano kumntwana wakho.
Ulwaphulo lwengqondo kunye novelwano , okanye ukukwazi ukubeka izicathulo zabanye kwaye ziqwalasele iimvakalelo kunye neengcamango zabo, ngenye yezona zinto zibaluleke kakhulu kubantu abalungileyo. Ucwaningo luye lwabonisa ukuba unesimo esiphezulu somoya-oko kukuthi, ukukwazi ukuqonda iimvakalelo zakho kunye neemvakalelo zabanye kunye nokuzithiba nokukwazi ukulawula iimvakalelo zakho - luyinxalenye ebalulekileyo yokuphumelela ebomini. Ukukhuthaza uvelwano kumntwana wakho, khuthaza umntwana wakho ukuba athethe ngeemvakalelo zakhe aze aqiniseke ukuba uyazi ukuba uyabakhathalela. Xa kukho ukungquzulana nomhlobo, mbuze ukuba acinge ukuba umhlobo wakhe unokuziva njani kwaye abonise iindlela zakhe zokulawula iimvakalelo zakhe kunye nokusebenza ngokufanelekileyo kwisigqibo.
- Mkhuthaze ukuba akhulise abanye ngaye kwaye angaze adilize nabani na.
Nangona iindaba malunga nezingane ezibandakanya ukuxhatshazwa kunye nezinye izinto ezimbi zihlala ziqhuba iintloko, inyaniso kukuba abantwana abaninzi benza izinto ezintle ngokuzenzekelayo kwikhondo eliqhelekileyo lobomi babo, ingaba kwenza umngane ukuba azive ngcono xa ehla okanye engena kwindawo yoluntu . Njengoko ukhuthaza iziphatho ezintle ezifana nokwenza into eyenza ukuba umntu othile abe ngcono (nokuba yinto encinci njengokwenza umhlobo kumgxa xa ebuhlungu), qiniseka ukuthetha malunga nemiphumo emibi yokuziphatha okanye ukuxhatshazwa kunamacala omabini (zombini abo ba, bathi, abaxhatshazwayo kunye nabo baxhatshazwayo), kwaye kutheni kwaye kwenzeka njani ukuba buhlungu abantu.
- Mfundise ukuba azinikele.
Ingaba umntwana wakho unceda ummelwane osekhulile ngokugubungela umzila wendlela okanye kukunceda ukupakisha iimpahla ezinokungena kwiibhokisi zokunikela kwiindawo zokungcebeleka iintsapho, isenzo sokuzithandela singabumba umlingiswa womntwana wakho. Xa abantwana bebanceda abanye, bafunda ukucinga ngeemfuno zabangenalucalulo kunabo, kwaye banokuziqhayisa ngokwenza umehluko kubomi babanye. - Musa ukumvuza ngenxa yokuziphatha kakuhle okanye ukwenza ububele.
Into ebalulekileyo ukuba uyikhumbule xa ukhuthaza abantwana ukuba bancede abanye ukuba bangabavuzi ngalowo msebenzi. Ngaloo ndlela, umntwana wakho akayi kudibanisa nokuzithandela ngokuzitholela izinto aze afunde ukuba ukuziva uncedo ngokunceda abanye kuya kuba ngumvuzo. (Akutsho ukuba akufanele uthabathe umntwana wakho ukuba uphathe unyango olukhethekileyo okanye umnike isipho sokuncedisa abanye kunye nokusebenza kanzima nokufunda nzima, abantwana bathande ukukhuthazwa kwaye baphumelele ekuvunyelaneni kwabazali. indlela yokumbonisa indlela enombulelo ngayo ngezinto ezilungileyo azenzayo.) - Mfundise ukuziphatha okuhle.
Ingaba umntwana wakho uhlala eqhuba izinto ezisemgangathweni zokuziphatha ezinjengokuthi "Ndiyabonga" kwaye "Nceda"? Ingaba uthetha ngendlela ehloniphekileyo kubantu kunye nabadala bedilesi ngokuthi "Mnu" kunye Nks. " Ingaba uyazi indlela yokubulisa abantu ngokufanelekileyo , kwaye uyazi kakuhle izinto ezisiseko zeetable table ? Ingaba unesidima xa edlala umdlalo kunye nabahlobo? Khumbula ukuba ukhulisa umntu oya kuphuma ehlabathini aze asebenze nabanye ubomi bakhe bonke. (Kwaye lo mntu omncinci, njengoko ekhula, uya kuba setafileni isidlo kunye nawe kwaye asebenze nayo yonke imihla ade aphume kwidleke.) Unokudlala indima ebalulekileyo ekubunzeni indlela umntwana wakho oyenzayo ngayo.
- Mphathe ngobubele nangenhlonipho.
Indlela efanelekileyo kakhulu yokufumana abantwana ukuba bathethe nawe kunye nabanye ngendlela ehloniphekileyo kunye nokusebenzisana nabanye ngendlela enhle ngokukwenza oko kanye xa usebenzisana nomntwana wakho. Cinga ngendlela othetha ngayo nomntwana wakho. Ngaba uthetha kakubi xa ungonwabanga ngento ethile? Ngaba ukhe wandila okanye uthethe izinto ezingekho kakuhle? Cinga indlela yakho yokuthetha, usebenze, kwaye ude ucinge, kwaye uzame ukukhetha ithoni enobubele kunye nenhlonipho kunye nomntwana wakho, nangona uthetha naye ngephutha okanye ukungalungi. - Musa utywaba malunga nokuyala umntwana wakho.
Abazali abanamathele ekunikezeni imida yabantwana okanye ngokuqinile (kodwa ngothando) ukulungisa ukuziphatha kakubi kungabonakalisa ukonakalisa umntwana wabo ngeenjongo ezilungileyo. Abantwana abangakhange baqeqeshwe ababi, banobugovu, kwaye ngokumangalisayo, abanelisekile. Ezinye zezona zizathu ezininzi zokuba sifuna ukuqeqeshwa ziquka ukuba abantwana abanikezwa imithetho ecacileyo, imida kunye nokulindela, banokuzimelela ngakumbi, banako ukwenza ukhetho oluhle kwaye banokukwazi ukwenza abahlobo baze bavuyiswe . Ngokukhawuleza xa ubona iingxaki zokuziphatha ezifana nokuxoka okanye ukubuyela emva , ziphathe ngokuthandana, ukuqonda nokuqina.
- Mfundise indlela yokubulela.
Ukufundisa umntanakho indlela yokubulela kunye nendlela yokubonisa ukubonga ngayo inxalenye ephambili yokukhulisa umntwana omhle. Ingaba kukudla okulungiselelwe isidlo sakusihlwa okanye isipho sokuzalwa ku-Grandma noMkhulu, fundisa umntwana wakho ukuba akubonge. Ngezinto ezifana nezipho zokuzalwa kunye neeholide, qiniseka ukuba umntwana wakho uqala umkhwa wokubhala ukubonga amakhadi. - Mnike uxanduva malunga nendlu.
Xa abantwana beneluhlu olulindelekileyo lwemisebenzi efanelekileyo yokudala ekhaya, njengokunceda ukuseta itafile okanye ukutshaya phansi, bafumana umthwalo wemfanelo kunye nokufezekiswa. Ukwenza umsebenzi omhle kwaye uzive ngathi bafaka isandla kwizinto ezilungileyo zendlu kunokukwenza abantwana bazive beqhenyce ngokwabo, kwaye bancede babe nolonwabo ngakumbi. - Indlela yokuziphatha kakuhle.
Cinga indlela osebenzisana ngayo nabanye, nangona umntwana wakho engaboni. Ingaba uthi "Siyabonga" kumabhalana wokukhangela emarike? Ngaba uyayicacisa inhlebo malunga nabamelwane okanye abasebenzisana nabo? Ngaba usebenzisa i-tone yomsindo xa ubhekisana nabalindi? Akungena nto ukuba indlela ochaphazela ngqo ngayo abantwana bakho. Ukuba ufuna ukukhulisa umntwana omhle, ziphathe ngendlela ofuna ukuba umntwana wakho enze ngayo.