Ukuthandana nomntu onokuxhaphaza kunokukuphanga ukuzithemba kwakho
Ukuba unjengeyona nkwenkwezi, usenokungaqondi ukuba ukuxhaphazwa kwabantu abathandana nabo beselula kubangakanani. Unokholo lokuba oko kwenzeka kuphela komnye umntu esikolweni kude nalapho uhlala khona. Unokucinga ukuba iintombi azikwazi ukuxhaphaza, ukuba ngabafana abafana kuphela, okanye ukuba ukuxhaphazwa ngokwasemzimbeni kuphela yinto ebalulekileyo. Ukunyaniseka kukuba ukusetyenziswa kakubi kwentando yeselula kwenzeka kuyo yonke indawo, nakwiziko lakho.
Izibalo zithi iipesenti ezingama-23 zamantombazana asetsheni kunye nama-14 ekhulwini asemakhwenkwe adibana nobudlova obusondelene nabo ngaphambi kokuzalwa kwabo-18. Okwangoku, omnye wabafundi abayi-10 esikolweni esiphakamileyo uye wabetha ngenjongo yokubethwa, ukubetha, okanye ukulimaza ngokwenene ngumfana okanye intombi. Iingxaki kukuba oko kwenzeka ntoni kuwe okanye kumhlobo wakho.
Isinyathelo sokuqala sokuthintela ukusetyenziswa kakubi ebusweni bakho kukuqonda izibonakaliso zokuxhatshazwa ngokomzimba. Ukuba omnye wakho obalulekileyo wenza enye yezinto, kufuneka ucinge ngokuphathelele ukuphuma kwimizalwane.
Ukungayihloneli
Ukuba iqabane lakho elitshatileyo lihlekisa ngawe kwaye likubiza ngamagama ahloniphekileyo, ulwalamano kunye nomxhaphazi. Okunye ukungahloneli ngokunyanisekileyo ukuziphatha okubalulekayo kubandakanya:
- Ukukugxeka kunye nokunciphisa izimvo zakho
- Ukuxelela indlela onokuvakalelwa ngayo kunokuba wamukele iimvakalelo zakho zokwenene
- Ukumangalela ukuba unentlungu okanye uvakalelwa xa uzama ukuxoxa ngokuziphatha kakubi
IZenzo eziPhezulu kunye neentloko
Abaxhatshazi bathetha nabanye kwaye bayazithoba kwaye bahlambalaza. Unokumva uthe iimbono zakho (kunye neengcamango zabanye) ziyintsipho okanye aziqondi.
Ngokuqhelekileyo, abantu abaxhaphazayo nabaxhaphaza bathetha ukuba wena okanye abanye baphantsi ngendlela ethile. Ngokulula, ezi zenzo ziyinxalenye yesicwangciso sokugcina amandla kunye nokulawula phezu kwakho okanye kwabanye.
Ukuthembela kwiNgcaciso
Ukuziphatha okungaxhatshaziyo yindlela yokwenza ngengqondo kunye / okanye yokwenyama yokuzama ukugcina nokugcina amandla kunye nokulawula phezu kwakho. Umlingane wakho osenyongweni unokuthi:
- Yiba sisongelo ngempawu ezifana nokubetha iindonga, ukuxhaphaza izilwanyana zakho, okanye ukuphonsa ifenitshala ngeenxa zonke
- Ukubonisa ukusetyenziswa kakubi kwengqondo kunye nosongelo kukuhlazisa ngokutyhila ulwazi oluyimfihlo
- Sebenzisa amagama okwenza uzive ungenakufaneleka ukuba ucinga ukuba awufanelanga unyango olungcono
Usilela uvelwano
Uvelwano kukungabikho kwemvakalelo kwabanye abantu kunye nomgangatho onokuthi abantu abanokuxhaphazwa ngokwenene abantu abanakho. Ababonisi iimvakalelo zangempela okanye inkxalabo kwabanye abantu. Ngokomzekelo, banokubonisa iimvakalelo, kodwa abaqinisekanga ngokwenene ngabo. Kunoko, kubonakala ngathi banokubeka isenzo sokwamkelwa kwiimeko ezichaziweyo. Akunakho ukuzisola ngokwenene nangayiphi na into ephosakeleyo.
Ukulwa Nomona Nomona
Ukubonakalisa umona nomona ngumfaki obomvu. Kwakhona kaninzi ngenye yezinto zokuqala oza kuzibona. Musa ukukhwele umona ngenxa yothando.
Ukuziphatha okungazikhuseli kukukhokelela ekulawuleni imiba kwaye ibonisa ukwesaba komntu onokuxhaphaza ukulahlekelwa buhlobo. Ukuba iqabane lakho elisondeleyo likhwele kakhulu, lixesha lokuhamba phambili ngaphambi kokuba izinto zikhuphuke.
Yenza iimfuno ezingenangqiqo
Abaxhatshazi bahlala bengenangqiqo kwabanye, ingakumbi abo bacinga ukuba bancinci kunabo, njengomgcini weenkonzo okanye abanye abasebenzi benkonzo. Ekugqibeleni, iqabane lakho liyakubeka iimfuno ezingenangqiqo kuwe, nawe. Umzekelo, lakho iqabane lingenza:
- Ufuna ukuchitha ixesha lakho kunye
- Zama ukulawula oko ugqoka
- Ukumangalela ngokungazibophelelanga kulwalamano ukuba awuhlangabezani neemfuno zakhe okanye ulandele imigaqo yakhe
Ostracizes and Isolates You
Ukuxhaphazwa nokuxhatshazwa konke kukulawula. Ezi nkxalabo zilindelekile kwaye zikhuphe nabani na abangenzi ibanga.
Njengoko baphendukela kakubi kwabo, bangase bazame ukulawula ubomi bakho ngokuthi:
- Ukuthatha iselfowuni yakho ukujonga iitekisi zakho, ukubiza izingcingo kunye nemilayezo ye-voicemail
- Ukugxeka abahlobo bakho namalungu entsapho
- Ukukuxhaphaza ukuba uchithe lonke ixesha lakho kunye nabo baze bacaphuke kwabanye abahlobo
Ukusebenzisa kakubi abanye
Abaxhaphazi nabaxhaphaza bahlala behlazisa abantu phambi kwabanye. Injongo yabo kukukwenza omnye umntu azive esincinci kwaye engenalutho ngelixa ephefumle amandla akhe kwimeko. Ukuba iqabane lakho okanye intombi yakho ihlala iqela ekubizeni igama , lixesha lokuphuma kuloo lamano.
Igama elivela kwi-Verywell
Khumbula, ukusetyenziswa kakubi kwanoma yiluphi uhlobo aluyinxalenye yobudlelwane obuhle. Okona, ukuxhatshazwa kwakho kunye nokunyeliswa kakubi akuyiyo inkohlakalo yakho. Ezi ziphatha ezingalunganga zikhethwa ngumntu onokuxhaphaza kwaye loo mntu wedwa unoxanduva lokuziphatha.
Ukuba ucinga ukuba umnandi wakho unokukuxhaphaza, thola inkxaso yangaphandle kwaye ujonge iinketho malunga nendlela yokuphelisa ubuhlobo. Thetha nabazali bakho okanye omnye umntu omdala othembekileyo kwaye uthathe isilumkiso ngaphambi kokuba uyibize. Eli lixesha elinye xa ukuphulaphula ngomyalezo wesicatshulwa okanye kuluntu kulungile. Ubundlobongela buhlala bukhula xa ubuhlobo buya kupheliswa. Qinisekisa ukuba uhlala ukhuselekile xa wenza ukupheka kokugqibela.
> Imithombo:
> Amacandelo okuLawula nokuLawula izifo. Ukutshatyalaliswa kwentlobano. ISebe lezeMpilo laseMelika kunye neeNkonzo zoLuntu. 2018.
> Amacandelo okuLawula nokuLawula izifo. Inkqubo yokuHlola iNkcazo-Youth-United States, 2015 . ISebe lezeMpilo laseMelika kunye neeNkonzo zoLuntu. 2016. https://www.cdc.gov/healthyyouth/data/yrbs/pdf/2015/ss6506_updated.pdf