Ukugqiba xa kulungile ukushiya ikhaya lakho elivisayo yedwa ubusuku akusiyo isigqibo omele uyithathe. Ukushiya umntwana wakho ungakhange ulandelwe iiyure ezingama-24 okanye ngaphezulu kukho into enkulu. Izinto ziyakwazi ukungahambi kakuhle.
Nangona ubungozi obunokwenzeka, ukuvumela umntwana wakho ukuba ahlale ekhaya yedwa unokuphila enempilo. Emva koko, intombazana engazange ibe ne-supervision yabantu abadala ingalwela inkululeko yakhe entsha inokuqala xa ehamba ekolishi.
Njengabantwana abakhulileyo, bancitshisiwe ukuba bafune ukuhamba kunye nani kwihambo okanye ikhefu oqhubekayo. Ukufumana "umntwana" oneminyaka eli-16 ubudala akukona lula, nangona kunjalo.
Kodwa ngaphambi kokuba unqume ukuba ngaba ufuna ukunyanzela umntwana wakho ukuya kwindlu kaTogo okanye uvumele ukuba ahlale ekhaya yodwa, cinga ngezinto ezi.
Yiyiphi Iminyaka Efanelekileyo Yokushiya Umntwana Wakho?
A bambalwa bathi kwaye amazwe anemithetho echaza ngokucacileyo ubudala ubuncinane apho unokushiya ikhaya lakho leveki ubusuku bonke. Kodwa ezininzi iindawo zishiya isigqibo kubazali ukuba bathathe isigqibo.
Musa ukusekela isigqibo sakho kumntwana wakho oyedwa. Nangona abanye abaneminyaka engama-17 bekhulile ngokwaneleyo ukuba babe yedwa ekhaya iminyaka embalwa, abanye bangakulungele ukuxanduva.
Ngokuqhelekileyo, abaninzi abaselula abangaphantsi kwe-16 abavuthiwe ngokwaneleyo ukuba bahlale ekhaya bodwa ngobusuku. Kodwa, kubalulekile ukusekela isigqibo sakho kwinqanaba lakho lokukhula kwentsha .
Xa ucinga ngekhono lakho lentsha ngokuphepha ngokuhlala ekhaya yodwa, zibuze le mibuzo:
- Ingaba wakho umntwana uyakunyanisa ingcinezelo yontanga? Akuyena nje umntwana wakho omele uxhalabele. Ngamanye amaxesha enye enye intsha engakhokelela kwingxaki. Ingaba umntwana wakho unokuthi hayi ukuba umhlobo ugxininisa ukuba alahle iphathi ekhaya lakho? Ingaba umntwana wakho angamelana nokuxhoma kunye nesihlwele esingalunganga xa ungekho ekhaya?
- Ingaba umntwana wakho uyazi indlela yokuphendula kwimeko engxamisekileyo? Kukho iintlobo zeemeko ezinokuthi zenzeke ngokukhawuleza ezingabakho xa ungekho, ukusuka kwintsi ephukile ukuya emlilweni. Ingaba wakho umntwana uyazi ukuba wenzeni xa kwenzeka imeko engxamisekileyo? Ingaba wakho umntwana uya kwenza izigqibo ezinempilo ngokuzimeleyo ngelixa uxinzezelekile?
- Ingaba unayo umntu ukuba ahlolisise wakho umntwana? Umhlobo okanye ilungu lentsapho elinokungena ngokukhawuleza kunye nentombazana yakho inokuthintela iingxaki ezininzi. Umntu oqhagamshelana naye othembekileyo unokukunika kunye nentombazana yakho ingcamango engqondweni. Qinisekisa ukuba umntwana wakho unenombolo yefowuni kubantu abanokuqhagamshelana naye ukuba unayo nayiphi na ingxaki xa uphuma edolophini.
- Ingaba wakho umntwana uya kuba noxanduva kwabanye? Yinto enye yokucela umntu oneminyaka engama-16 ukuba ahlale ekhaya yedwa ubusuku, kodwa kuhluke ngokupheleleyo ukucela umntwana wakho ukuba akhatyathele abantakwabo abancinci. Cinga ukufumana indawo yabantakwabo abancinci ukuba bahambe xa uvumela umntwana wakho ukuba ahlale ekhaya yedwa emva kokuba amcele ukuba abele umntwana.
- Ingaba umntwana wakho uyakwesaba? Nangona abanye abantwana abasayi kuvuma, abaninzi babo bayesaba ukuba bekhaya bodwa ebusuku. Ukuba umntwana wakho wesibini uyesaba umnyama, uya kuthatha njani ukuhlala ekhaya yedwa ebusuku? Wayeza kuthini ukusabela kwingxolo engaqhelekanga ayiva phakathi kobusuku?
- Intsha yakho ilandela njani imithetho? Ukuba umntwana wakho akakwazi ukulandela imigaqo xa uhlala ekhaya, kunokwenzeka ukuba akayi kulandela imithetho xa uhamba.
Ukulungiselela Umntwana Wakho Wokuba Wodwa Ebusuku
Ukuba umntwana wakho uyakwazi ukulawula ukuhlala ekhaya yedwa ngexesha lexesha elide, unokulungele inkululeko enkulu .
Ukuba uye wamvumela ukuba abe yedwa yedwa kude kube phakathi kwamabhongo aze aphendule kakuhle, mhlawumbi unokukwazi ukuhlala ekhaya yedwa ubusuku bonke.
Into engcono kakhulu ongayenzayo kukunika umntwana wakho ulutsha ngokunyanisekileyo. Thatha amanyathelo okuphepha ukuze ulungiselele umntwana wakho ukuba abe yedwa ekhaya ebusuku.
Mbuze ukuba uza kuthatha njani iimeko ezithile, njengomfokazi oza emnyango, i-alarm alarm, okanye ummelwane ukuba abuze ukuba uphuma edolobheni. Qinisekisa ukuba unolwazi olufunekayo ukuze ahlale ekhuselekileyo ngobusuku.
> Imithombo:
> I-American Academy Yomntwana Ne-Adolescent Psychiatry: Ikhaya Lodwa Abantwana.
> I-Gateway Information Information Gateway: Ukushiya Umntwana Wakho Ekhaya. Septemba, 2013.
> HealthyChildren.org: Ingaba Umntwana Wakho Ulungele Ukuhlala Ekhaya?