Ukungaphumeleli kwimeko yokubhekisela kumntu kubhekisela kumntu onokuveliswa yizinto eziphilayo, kodwa ngenxa yemeko yabo, abakwazi ukuba nabantwana ngendlela eqhelekileyo.
Basenokufuna unyango lwezityalo zokukhulelwa okanye ukunyanzeliswa ekukhetheni ubomi obungenasiphelo. Basenokufuna ezinye iindlela zokwakha zentsapho (njengokwamkelwa).
Kwakhona kubalulekile, lo mntu okanye isibini sinokuthanda ukuba nabantwana, nangona imeko yabo.
(Andiyi kusebenzisa eli thuba kumntu kwimeko apho abanako abantwana, kodwa bona ngokwabo abanomdla wokuba nabantwana.)
Kutheni sifuna le Themu
Ndakuqala ukuva eli gama kwikhasi le-Facebook le-Broken Brown Egg (okufuneka ulandele ngokupheleleyo, ngendlela). Ukufuna uphendlo olufutshane lwe-Intanethi kude, ndafumanisa uMelissa Ford we-Stirrup uQueens uxoxela ibinzana encwadini yakhe Ukuhamba kwilizwe le-IF.
Andikwazi ukuba yintoni na apho ibinzana lokuqala liba khona. Ndivuyiswa ngokwenene, nokuba kunjalo. Ngomzuzu ndawubona, ndacinga, "Ewe! Ekugqibeleni, ibinzana endifunayo! "
Sonke siqonde inkcazo epheleleyo yokungabikho kwempilo - indoda kunye nomfazi ohamba emva kokuzama ukukhulelwa aphelelwe ngumntwana .
Kodwa kuthiwani ngabo bafuna ukuba nomntwana, banqwenele abantwana ngentliziyo yabo yonke, kodwa abanako ukufumana esinye sezizathu?
Kuthiwani ngezibini ezithandekayo ngokwenene-kodwa kukho enye into emi endleleni phakathi kwabo nomntwana?
Into efuna ukuba bafune unyango lwezonyango , okanye baqhube ukuba baqwalasele ezinye iindlela zokwakha zentsapho ...
Aba bantu bahamba ngesifo sengqondo esifanayo njengoko isibini esinezintlu.
Ukuba bakhetha ukusukela unyango okanye ukwamkelwa komntwana, bahamba noxinzelelo olufanayo ekwakheni iintsapho zabo ngokunjalo.
Le yilapho ixesha lokungabikho kwengqondo lemeko liza kudlala.
Ngubani onokuthi le Nkundla ifake isicelo
Eli akusiyo lixesha lezonyango, kwaye ayinayo inkcazelo ye-ironclad.
Ngaloo nto yathi, nantsi imimiselo yabantu esingaba sithethayo bafumana ukungabikho kobubele bendawo ...
(Kwakhona, eli gama lisebenza kuphela ukuba umntu ufuna ukuba nezingane.)
Abafazi abangabodwa
Unina-ngo-Option-Choice - yindlela eya kubazali ukuba abaninzi abafazi bathathe.
Abanye baphela apho emva kweminyaka yokungaboni umntu oza kuhlala naye. Abanye banquma ukuba ngabomama abangatshatanga-ngokuzikhethela ekuqaleni, kungakhathaliseki ukuba bangaphathelene nabantwana abadlulayo okanye bangoku.
Isizathu sokukhetha ukuba ngumama ongatshatanga nxamnye. Umgca wesibini umfazi akakwazi ukukhulelwa yedwa. Udinga umniki wesilisa.
Ukuba ibhinqa ifuna abantwana kodwa ayifuni ukukhulisa umntwana ngokwabo, banokunyanzeliswa ukuba bakhethe ubomi obungabantwana.
Ingaba ibhinqa elingatshatangayo lizimisele ukuqhubela phambili ngokusasaza okanye ukugqiba ubomi obungenabantwana, ukuba bafuna abantwana, sinokuthi ufumana ukungabikho komntwana.
Amadoda angatshatanga
Xa ndicinga ngomntu oyedwa ofuna abantwana ngaphezu kwanto nantoni na, ngokukhawuleza ndicinge ngomlingisi uMichael Scott, ukusuka kumdlalo we-comedy udlala.
Umnqweno wakhe kubantwana kodwa ukungakwazi ukufumana umntu ukuba abe nabo kwakuyingxenye ebalulekileyo yomboniso.
UMichael Scott akazange afune unyango lokuzala ukuze abe nosapho, kodwa unako.
Amadoda angatshatanga afuna ukuba nomntwana kaninzi akakwazi ukuwamkela. Bayazama, kwaye banokufaka isicelo, kodwa bahlala bexoshwa phantsi kweloluhlu.
(Ngokuqhelekileyo, imibhangqwana engatshatanga ngesini esiphezulu kwoluhlu, ilandelwa mhlawumbi ngabasetyhini abangatshatanga, kwaye kuphela emva koko, amadoda angatshatanga.
Nangona kunjalo, indoda engatshatangayo iyafuna ukuba nomntwana angakwazi ukuguquka.
Basenokuba nomntwana we-biological ngokusebenzisa umxhasi kunye nomnikeli weqanda.
Okanye banokukhetha ukuhamba kunye nomnikeli wombindi (ixabiso elincinane kangako) okanye umnikeli weqanda kunye nomnikeli wesidoda (kubiza kakhulu.)
Batshati
Umbhangqwana onobungqingili ofuna ukuba nomntwana unokukhetha ezimbini: ukwamkela okanye uphendukela kumniki wesini.
Ukwamkelwa komntwana kungenakho okanye akunakukhetha. Ezinye iindawo azivumeli ngokusemthethweni isibini sesibini ukuba sithathe umntwana. Basenokuvumela omnye wabafazi ukuba bamkele umntwana, kodwa abanako ukwabelana ngokumkelwa ngokomthetho.
Ngokuqhelekileyo, izibini ezitshatileyo ezithatha umtshato kufuneka ziphendule kwiinkampani zamanyathelo ezamkelwayo ngamazwe okanye ziqwalasele ukuthotyelwa phakathi kwesibini kunye nomntu ngommeli (ngesinye isilungiso esichengileyo, ngendlela). Ngokudabukisayo, amanqwanqwa amaninzi awamkela abantwana angabakhokelela.
Enye inketho kukuba nomntwana ngokusebenzisa umniki wesilisa. Basenokukhetha okanye bangakhethi ukusebenzisa amaqanda abo, kodwa ukuba bayayenza, umntwana uya kuhambelana nomnye wabo.
Eyona nto ibalulekile ukuba bafuna ukutholwa okanye ukunyanga ukuba babe nomntwana.
Amadoda angqingili
Njengemibhangqwana engqingili, iintsingiselo zabo zokwamkelwa komntwana zingancinci. Kunokwenzeka, kodwa kunokuba nzima.
Njengamadoda angatshatanga afuna ukuba ooyise, izibini ezitshatileyo zithatha isinqumo sokwakha intsapho ngokuxhomekeka. Ukuba omnye wamadoda unikela ngesidoda, uya kuba nguyise wezinto eziphilayo.
Abo Baphila Ngesifo Esiyingozi
Eli qela labantu lingabandakanya abafazi abangenakuyeka ukuthatha imithi eyingozi ngexesha lokukhulelwa.
Oku kubandakanya nabasetyhini abaneembali zesifo sengqondo, okanye ukuxinezeleka okanye into ethile, leyo ingasongelwa yingozi ngenxa yokuxinwa kokukhulelwa okanye ngexesha lokuvalelwa kwexesha.
Inokubandakanya amadoda kunye nabasetyhini abanokuthanda ukuba nabantwana kodwa bahlala nezifo ezingapheliyo eza kwenza ukuba umntwana akhule okanye angenzeki.
Ngokuxhomekeke kwimeko, iinqununu zezi ntsapho ziquka ukugqiba ubomi obungenabantwana, ukuzondla okanye ukuthatha umntwana.
Abasetyhini okanye Amadoda abafumana iingxaki zesondo
Ukuba isibini asikwazi ukulala ngesondo ukuze ukhulelwe, abayikwazi ukukhulelwa ngaphandle koncediso.
Yintoni enokubangela olu hlobo lweengxaki? Kubafazi, intlungu ngexesha lokwabelana ngesondo kunokukwenza kube nzima ukukhulelwa.
Kubantu, iingxaki ezingapheliyo kunye ne-erectile dysfunction zinokuma endleleni yokuzala umntwana.
Ngoku, intlungu ngexesha lesini kunye nokungaxilisi kwe-erectile yimiba yezokwelapha, kwaye ingaba yimboqo yimeko engaphantsi kwayo eyenza ukukhulelwa . Olu hlobo lwesimo lunokuba ngumntu ongenakwenyuka.
Okanye, iingxaki zesini zingabangela enye into. Ngamanye amazwi, ezi zibini ziyakwazi ukukhulelwa ngokuqhelekileyo ukuba abazange babe neengxaki zesini.
Akunasiphelo, ngencazelo. Kodwa banemiqobo efanayo.
Ukuba ingxaki yesini ayiphathwa ngokulula, ukhetho lwezi zibini zifana nezibini ezinengxaki yokungabikho kwempilo: unyango lwezonyango (mhlawumbi ukwenziwa kwe-intanethi), ukwamkelwa, okanye ukhetha ubomi obungabantwana.
Abantu abahlala kwiNtlupheko
Ababini abangenako ukukwazi ukukhulisa abantwana banokuwela phantsi kwenkcazo yokungabikho komntwana.
Le ngxabano ukubandakanya, kodwa ndicinga ukuba kufanelekile.
Kukho abo bangatshoyo ukuba isibini esincinci kakhulu ukuba sibe nezingane singasenabo-kwaye baninzi abantu. (Ezinye ziphela kwisitalato okanye kwezinye iimeko ezixinzelelekileyo ... kungeyona imeko efanelekileyo ukuzifumana kuyo.)
Abanye banokuthi "ngokuhlelwa kohlahlo lwabiwo-mali" okanye "imfundo engcono" ezi zibini zingabantwana "ukuba befuna ngokwenene."
Nangona kunjalo, andiyi kuthetha nayiphi na loo nto. Kulungile kwaye akunjalo.
Kukho imibhangqwana ngaphandle apho inokuthanda ukuba nezingane kodwa ayikwazi ukukwazi ukuyenza. Inketho yabo yokuqala kukukhetha ubomi obungabantwana, kwaye simele siyixhase kwaye siyayihlonela loo nto.
Ukubonisa inhlonipho ngala madoda nabasetyhini kuthetha ukuvuma ukuba "ukungabikho kwengqondo" kunzima kunzima ukujamelana nayo nanjengomnye umntu ongenakho ukukhulelwa.
> Imithombo:
Ford, uMelissa. Ukujikeleza umhlaba we-IF: Ukuqonda ukungafihli kunye nokuCinga ngeenketho zakho . UCwinezelo lweComment; Inkqubo yokuqala (ngoMeyi 5, 2009).
Mendelsohn, uMichael. "Ngokuchanekileyo, amadoda angatshatanga, afuna abantwana, aphendukele kwi-Surrogacy." AbcNews.com. http://abcnews.go.com/US/straight-single-men-wanting-kids-turn-surrogacy/story?id=16520916