Kunokuba nzima ukuvumela umntwana wakho enze ukhetho olubi. Kodwa, ukuvumela umntwana wakho enze iphosakelo unokufundisa isifundo esibalulekileyo ukuba umvumela ukuba abhekane nemiphumo yemvelo ngenxa yesigqibo sakhe.
Awunayo imiphumo yemvelo. Kunoko, ngokuqinisekileyo kufuneka uphume kwindlela kwaye uvumele umntwana wakho abe nama-ramifications amaphutha akhe.
Imizekelo yeziphumo zendalo
Kukho amaxesha amaninzi xa unokwenza isigqibo sokuvumela umntwana wakho ukuba abhekane nemiphumo yemvelo yezenzo zakhe. Nazi ezinye zeendlela iindlela abazali abangenza ngayo iziphumo zemvelo:
- Vumela umntu oneminyaka eyi-10 ukuba aphume ngaphandle ngaphandle kwengubo ngosuku olushushu (ngokude nje kungabonakalisi kubanda). Umphumo wendalo kukuba uya kuzizwa ebanda.
- Vumela umntu oneminyaka eyi-15 ukuba abeke ixesha lakhe lokulala. Imiphumo yendalo yokuhlala ixesha elide kakhulu kukuba uya kuziva ediniwe ngentsasa elandelayo.
- Vumela umntu oneminyaka engama-9 ukuba ashiye enye yeempawu zakhe ngaphandle kwintshontshi. Umphumo wendalo wokungabikho koxanduva lwakhe kukuba umdlalo wakhe ungase uchithe ilanga okanye imvula.
- Vumela umntu oneminyaka engama-12 ukuba asebenzise imali yakhe ngokukhawuleza xa efumana. Umphumo wendalo kukuba uya kuphelelwa yimali kwaye akayi kukwazi ukuthatha inxaxheba komnye umsebenzi.
- Vumela umntwana oneminyaka engama-7 ukuba akhohlise kumdlalo kunye nomntakwabo. Umphumo wendalo kukuba umzalwana wakhe akayi kudlala naye.
Ziziphi iziphumo zendalo ezifundisayo
Abazali abangaphaya kwamanye amazwe bancedisa abantwana kwimiphumo yemvelo. Ngenxa yoko, abantwana babo abanalo mathuba okubuyisela emva kokungaphumeleli okanye ukufunda indlela yokubuyisela kwiimpazamo.
Abaninzi babo abaziqondi izizathu ezivela kwimithetho yabazali babo. Esikhundleni sokufunda, "kufuneka ndigqoke ibhatyi ngenxa yokuba kubanda ngaphandle," umntwana angaphetha ngokuthi, "Ndimele ndigqoke ijacket kuba umama wandenza."
Imiphumo yemvelo ilungiselela abantwana abadala ngokubancedisa ukuba bacinge ngemiphumo ebalulekileyo yokukhetha kwabo. Abantwana bafunda ukudibanisa izenzo zabo nemiphumo xa bevunyelwe ukuba bafumane iziphumo zokuziphatha kwabo.
Imiphumo yemvelo ibuye ikwazi ukulungisa isisombululo seengxaki. Ukuba umntwana wakho wangena ngaphandle ngaphandle kwejacket izolo kwaye wayeziva kubanda, namhlanje uya kuba nokucinga malunga noko angakwenza ukuze kuthintele ukuba kungabikho kwakhona.
Ukongeza, uya kuba nako ukukhusela iingxaki zamandla xa uphuma kwindlela kwaye uvumele umntwana wakho aqhube phambili ngeengcamango zakhe. Awudingi ukuxabana ngokuthi kutheni akufanele enze into kwaye akudingeki ukuba ugxininise ukuba wenze ukhetho olubi.
Ixesha lokusebenzisa iziphumo zendalo
Sebenzisa imiphumo yemvelo ngokumodareyitha. Qaphela ngokukhawuleza ukuba umphumo wendalo uza kuba nomthelela njani kumntwana wakho kwaye ube negalelo kumava akhe okufunda jikelele. Ngamanye amaxesha, ukuthatha amalungelo okanye ukubeka umntwana ngexesha lokuphuma kusebenza ngakumbi.
Imiphumo yemvelo ayisebenzi kakuhle kubantwana abancinci. Abafundi besikolo kunye nabantwana abasesikolweni esikolweni abancinci banako ukuqonda ukuba isiphumo siphumelele ngokuziphatha kwabo.
Ukuba uvumela umntu oneminyaka engama-4 ubudala akhethe ixesha lakhe lokulala, mhlawumbi akayi kukwazi ukuba ukhathele ngenxa yokuba uhlale ephuzile.
Ngaphandle kokuba aqonde isizathu kunye nesiphumo, akakwazi ukukhetha ixesha lokulala ngexesha langaphambili.
Qinisekisa ukuba umntwana wakho uyakwazi ukuxhamla ukuxhamla kwaye usebenzise eso sifundo kwihambo lakhe elizayo. Uninzi ulutsha lufanele lukwazi ukubona indlela ukuziphatha kwabo kubangele ngayo.
Ixesha lokukhusela iziphumo zendalo
Imiphumo yemvelo ifanele isetyenziswe xa ikhuselekile ukwenza njalo. Musa ukuvumela umntwana wakho ukuba achukumise isitofu eshushu ukuba 'amfundise isifundo.' Unokulimala kakhulu.
Xa kunomcimbi wokukhusela, ungenelela ngaphambi kokuba umntwana wakho enze iphutha. Chaza ukuba kutheni ukuziphatha kwakhe kungamkelekanga kwaye xa kuyimfuneko, landela umphumo onengqiqo.
Imiphumo yemvelo ifanele isetyenziswe ukufundisa abantwana ukuba benze ukhetho olungcono kwixesha elizayo, kungekhona ukubenza bahlupheke ngenxa yeepazamo abazenzayo ngaphambili. Ngoko ngaphambi kokuba uvumele imiphumo yemvelo ukuba yenzeke, qiniseka ukuba umntwana wakho uya kukwazi ukufunda ngokusemthethweni isifundo somntu.
> Imithombo
> Ulungiso. I-American Academy Yomntwana Ne-Adolescent Psychiatry. Upapashwe ngo-Apreli, 2015.
> Morin A. Izinto 13 Abazali Abanamandla Akunakwenzi: Ukukhulisa Abantwana Abazimeleyo Nokuqeqesha Ubomi babo Ubomi Bemihlali, Injongo, Nempumelelo . ENew York, NY: UWilliam Morrow, umxholo weHarperCollinsPublishers; 2017.