Indlela yokuSombulula iingxabano zakho zoNxibelelaniso eziMbi kakhulu

Ukukhathala Kokuphikisana? Indlela yokuSombulula iingxabano ezili-10 eziqhelekileyo zoMzali

Kukunzima ukuba nomzali-ntsebenziswano ngaphandle kokuphikisana ne-ex yakho yangoku. Kodwa kubalulekile ukugxila kwiphepha lexesha elide kwaye wenze okulungileyo kubantwana bakho - kungekhona ukuzikhukhumeza kwakho, yintoni evakalelwa 'ngokufanelekileyo' ngexesha, okanye oko kunokukunceda ukuba 'uzuze.' Nazi ezinye zeendlela eziqhelekileyo zokubambisana kunye nabazali, kunye nento enokuyenza ngexesha elizayo le micimbi iya kubudlelwane bakho bobuhlobo.

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Siphikisana Ngexesha Lokuzali

Zama ukukhumbula ukuba kunengqiqo ukucwangcisa umzali ngamnye ukuba achithe ixesha elininzi kunye nabantwana emva kokuqhawula umtshato njengoko benza ngaphambi kokuhlukana kokuqala. Ukongezelela, khumbula ukuba ixesha lakho abantwana bahlala esikolweni kunye nemisebenzi ayilona 'ixesha lokuzali.' Ukuthintela iingxabano, yenza isicwangciso esisemthethweni sokuzala kwaye uhlaziye ubuncinane kanye ngonyaka.

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Siphikisana Ngenkxaso Yomntwana

Iintsapho ezininzi ziqala ukucinga ukuba inkxaso yenkxaso yenkqubo yenziwa kanye kunye. Kodwa enyanisweni, kukho iindleko ezongezelelweyo eziza kubakho, ukuguquka kwindleko enokubangela ukukhulisa abantwana bakho kwizigaba ezahlukeneyo ebomini babo, kunye nokuhlengahlengiswa kwemali yakho-nayiphi na into enokuchaphazela imali yokuxhasa umntwana. Ukuba ufumanisa ukuba uyaphikisana nokuqhubeka kwakho ngokuphindaphindiweyo malunga nenkxaso yabantwana, khumbula ukuba iinkundla zikhuphe ngokusemthethweni umyalelo wokuxhasa abantwana, ngaba umzali angacela ukuhlaziywa ngenxa yenguqu kwiimeko kunye / okanye iimfuno. Nangona kunjalo, amaninzi amaninzi akwenza umlinganiselo wokuba bahlaziya rhoqo ii-oda zokuxhasa abantwana, ngoko uya kufuna ukujonga izikhokelo zenkxaso yabantwana kwilizwe lakho ukuze ufunde kabanzi malunga nendlela yokucela ukuguqulwa kwenkxaso kumntwana kwindawo yakho.

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I-Ex Ex Yethu Izingane zethu phakathi

Le nto inzima ukujongana nayo kuba mhlawumbi uva malunga nombandela wesibini kubantwana bakho. Into endiyincomayo kukuba uthetha kunye neyokuqala ngokukodwa malunga neenkxalabo zakho uze uchaze imizekelo ethile, ukuba kunokwenzeka. Kwakhona kunokuba luncedo ukudibana ne-ex yakho kwivenkile yekhofi okanye enye indawo engathathi hlangothi kule ncoko, ngoko unako ukuthetha ngokukhululekile ngaphandle kwengozi yokuba abantwana bakho baya kuvelela ingxoxo yakho.

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Asivumelani malunga nokulungiswa

Olu hlobo lwenkqubela yokubambisana ngokubambisana lunokuhamba ngeendlela zombini, kunye nabazali abathile bayamangalela ukuba baxakeke kakhulu, kwaye abanye bathi ukuqala kwabo kunzima kakhulu kubantwana. Kwaye ekugqibeleni, kubalulekile ukukhumbula ukuba iindlela zokubeletha zihlukile. Nangona wena kunye nomntu wakho ohlala naye sele nihlala nitshatile kwaye nihlala ndawonye njengoko nakhulisisa abantwana benu, niya kuqhubeka nxamnye nale ngxaki. Kwaye nangona kungenangqiqo ukulindela ukuba umntu wakho ode enze yonke into 'indlela yakho,' nantoni na evakalelwa kuwe ingozi eyingozi ingenxa yokukhathazeka kwangempela. Ngoko kubalulekile ukuba uhlole okokuqala kukukukhathaza ukuba ujongene nenkinga yokhuseleko okanye ukhetho lomzali.

Ukuba izicwangciso zakho zokuqeqesha ziziva zingakhuselekanga kuwe, thetha naye ngaye okanye, ngenxa yokukhathazeka ngokukhawuleza ngokukhuseleko kwabantwana bakho, biza u-9-1-1. Ukukhathazeka okukhuselekileyo okungafikeleli loo nqanaba le-alamu, kodwa kusekufuneka ulungiswe, uthetha negqwetha lakho.

Ukujongana nemibandela yokukhanya yokuziphatha, xoxa kunye ngqo neenkxalabo zakho uze uchaze imizekelo ethile. Ulwimi olunjengeli "Ndiqaphele" lunokuba luncedo ekwenzeni ingongoma yakho ngaphandle kokumangalela okanye ukumangalela - kokubili xa ukhankanya oko kukukhathazayo, kwaye xa ubeka ingqalelo malunga noko kusebenza nezingane zakho. Kuba ekugqibeleni, yiloo nto. Akunakukwenza ukwenza kwakho okwenzayo ngendlela yakho. Kuthe malunga neendlela zokwabelana ngazo obabili owaziyo ukusebenza nabantwana bakho.

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Asivumelani Ngomsebenzi wesikolo

Enye ingxabano eqhelekileyo yabazali-co-parent. Kwaye amaninzi amaninzi, impela ingxaki yesitayela, ngokubhekiselele kwindlela 'yokunene' nendlela 'engalunganga' yomzali. Unokukhetha ukuba abantwana baqhube phantsi baze benze umsebenzi wesikolo ngokukhawuleza xa behamba emnyango, ngelixa i-ex yakho ingabavumela ukuba balinde de emva kokutya. Nangona ukuzalana ngokubambisana ngokubambisana kukuyinxalenye ebalulekileyo yokunceda abantwana bakho bazi ukuba balindele ntoni, akudingeki wenze yonke into efanayo ngendlela efanayo. Izingane zakho zihlakaniphile ngokwaneleyo kwaye ziguquguqukayo ngokwaneleyo ukujongana nohlobo oluthile. Ngoko nje ngokuba umsebenzi wesikolo usenza, qwa lasela ukuhamba 'apho' kwaye 'nini.'

Ngakolunye uhlangothi, ukuba imfundo yakho yangaphambili ye-devalues ​​ukuba abantwana bakho basayi kuphinda babuyele endaweni yakhe kunye nomsebenzi wabo wesikolo okwenziweyo, ngoko kuya kufuneka ukuba nencoko malunga nendlela onokuxhasa ngayo imfundo yabo kwaye uncede baphumelele eklasini. Ukuya kwinkomfa yomzali-titshala kunye kunye kunokunceda ukuqinisa umyalezo wokuba umsebenzi wesikolo uyinxalenye ebalulekileyo yamava emfundo akho abantwana.

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I-Ex Ex yami iya kuMicromanage Me

Ndiyibona le nto, kwaye ngokwenene ingxaki kubazali bobabini - omnye owenziwe nge micromaged kunye nalowo ozama ukulawula yonke into eyenziwa ngumnye umzali. Ukuba uthanda ukuba yi-'romromanager, 'cinga ngendlela ofunde ngayo yonke into oyaziyo malunga nezingane zakho nokuba ngumzali. Awuzange uyifunde yonke encwadini, kwaye awufundile konke kubazali bakho okanye ubukele ezinye iintsapho. Uninzi lwento oyaziyo malunga nezingane zakho ezifunayo zifunyenwe ngamava okuqala. Yaye xa uthetha umva wakho, uyamphanga (kunye nezingane zakho) zolu thuba lokufunda. Ukuqalisa, i-ex yakho ayiyi kuyenza 'into' ofuna ukuba yona ifunde ngo-micromanaging. Iphelisa nje ulwalamano olubambisana kunye nokwenza kube nzima ukusebenza kunye.

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I-Ex Ex My Bully

Sisebenzise ukuthetha ngokuxhatshazwa njengengxaki yesikolo, kunene? Kodwa kwenzeka sonke ixesha phakathi kwabantu abadala. Utshutshiso nobundlobongela abuyize zifumaneke iindlela zokunxibelelana nabakho. Yaye ukuba uthe waziva usongelo, kufuneka uthethe negqwetha lakho ngokufumana umyalelo wokumisela. Ngakolunye uhlangothi, ukuba wena nabantwana bakho ningekho engozini engozini, kodwa i-ex yakho isetyenziselwa ukufumana indlela yakhe yokucinga ukuba uya kuhamba kunye nayo nayiphi na isicelo, ngoko ndincoma ukubeka kwakhona imida yakho . Oku akuthethi ukuba ungabambisani okanye ulawule ukuthetha kunye nawe, kodwa kuthetha ukuthatha indawo eyaneleyo yokucinga ngempendulo yakho ngaphambi kokuba uthi 'yebo' okanye 'cha' kwisicelo.

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I-Ex Ex yami ayihloneli iNtsapho yam

Nantsi enye inkxwabo edibeneyo yomzali. Kwaye kuyabuhlungu kuba abantwana bakho bafanelwe ukuba nobuhlobo kunye nawo onke amalungu enu asetsatsheni - owakho kunye nabakho. Kwezinye iimeko, kunokuba luncedo ukucinga ngendlela le ndlela yokungquzulana ibonakala ngayo. Ngaba idlalwa njengento yokucwangcisa? Ngaba kukho amanye amalungu entsapho yakho ukuba i-ex yakho inenkinga? Ukuchonga umzekelo kuya kukunceda ukhonkcoze ukuba wenze ntoni ngawo. Kwaye kwiimeko ezininzi, ukufikelela kwisisombululo kuya kubandakanya ukuzisa iinkxalabo zakho kwixesha lakho elide nokuhlaziya ukulindela oko kuthetha ukuxhasa ubudlelwane bezingane kunye neentsapho.

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I-Ex Ex idibanisa abantwana

Wayeqhele ukuva malunga 'nabazali baka Disneyland.' Uyazi, abo bayeza kuthatha abantwana babo kwi-Disneyland ngexesha lokuhlala ixesha elide lobazali, ngokuqhelekileyo 'babonise' omnye umzali onokungenazo iindlela zeholide ezinjalo. Namhlanje, oku kwenzeka ngekhulu leemeko ezahlukeneyo: ukuthenga iimpahla zokuyila, iifowuni, ii-laptops ... Uthiwa. Kwaye akunjalo nje ukuba unako ukukwazi ukufumana izibonelelo ezifanayo. Kukho umbandela wokwenene wokubeka abantwana ithuba lokuphila abangenakukwazi ukufumana, nokuba kunjalo. Njengokuba kunjalo neengxabano ezinokubambisana ngokubambisana apha, ukuthetha nomsebenzi wakho malunga neenkxalabo zakho kubalulekile. Akunjalo ukuba uya kukwazi ukuyeka le ndlela yonke, kodwa unokwazi ukukhuthaza u-ex ukuba ube neenjongo kwaye uqikelele ngendlela achitha ngayo imali kwizingane kwixesha elizayo.

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Abantwaba Banga Baziva Banyanzeliswa Ngama-Ex

Omnye umcimbi oqhelekileyo uquka indlela ohamba ngayo xa uchitha ixesha lokuchitha ixesha kunye nezingane. Ukuba isenzo siquka ukushiya ekunyamekelweni komnye umntu, njengekwenkwenkwe okanye intombi, okanye ukuwahoxisa, ngoko kulula ukubona ukuba kutheni abantwana beziva bebuhlungu kwaye bexhala. Kwiimeko apho ixesha lokubeletha okanye ukuvakasha liye lalelwe yinkantolo, kufuneka uxoxe negqwetha ngaphambi kokuba unqabe ukuba abantwana bathathe inxaxheba. Ngoba? Ngenxa yokuba, nangaphandle kokuba u-ex wakho engasebenzisi ilungelo lokuchitha ixesha elifanelekileyo kunye nezingane, ukukhanyela ukuhanjelwa kungakhokelela kwiinkathazo zakho zomthetho ngokuphula umthetho wenkundla.

Ukuba unobungane obuhle kunye ne-ex yakho, qalisa ngengxoxo malunga neento abantwana ababelane ngazo kunye nantoni na abaye bathetha ngayo ngendlela eyenza bazive ngayo. Ukuba ngaba yimiba yexesha, qwalasela ukuba ukutshintsha ixesha lakho lokuba ngumzali kunokuncedisa ukuba usebenzise ixesha elide kunye nabantwana endaweni yokubashiya ekukhathaleleni abanye.

Iingcamango Zokuvala

Zonke ezi zizombululo ziquka ukuthetha nomntu wakho. Kwaye oko kungenako ukukhululeka kuwe, ngakumbi ukuba izinto azihambanga kakuhle ngexesha elidlulileyo. Zama ukuthetha nencoko, nangona kunjalo, uze ungabonakalisi amagqabi okanye iimbambano ezidlulayo. Nangona kunzima, unokufumanisa ukuba ukuthetha ngokuxhalabisa kwakho kukunceda uvuselele ukuthembela kwakho kunye nokuqhubela phambili njengabazali-ntsebenziswano.