Ukuphila kunye ne-pakati kungacaciswa ngokuchanekileyo ngamazwi e-Forrest Gump, "Awukwazi ukuba uyintoni na." Inyaniso. Ukuqikelela ukuba i- middle of your heart isingenakwenzeka , kodwa into enye inokuqinisekileyo: i-kati ephakathi kakhulu iya kubonisa ukuthukuthela ngezikhathi ezithile. Umoya weengxaki unokwenza ubomi bomzali bunzima. Ukuba ucinga zonke iinguqu zentlalo, ukuguquka ngokwenyama nangokwemvakalelo eyenzekayo phakathi kwakho, akumangalisi.
Kodwa kunceda ukwazi apho umntwana wakho evela khona xa kufuneka unqume indlela oya kuphendula ngayo abantwana, umsindo kunye nazo zonke ezinye iimvakalelo ezinzima.
Iimbangela Zobushushu
Ukusuka kwimbono yentlalo, i-twewe ijongene neninzi . Phakathi kweminyaka engama-9 no-13 i-middle-class kufuneka ibhekane nokunyuka komsebenzi wesikolo, ukutshintsha ubudlelwane, isikolo esiphakathi , kunye neengcinezelo zontanga ezininzi ukuphumelela, ukuvukela, ukulungelelana nokuzibandakanya.
Ngokwenyama, i-tween iyatshintsha ngokukhawuleza. Imizimba yabo ikhula, i-hormone yabo iyatshintsha, kwaye ubuchopho babo bukhula. Ngelishwa, i-tween ayilungiselele ngokwenyama okanye emoyeni ukuba ihlangabezane nayo yonke into eyenzekayo kubo. Intukuthelo, ngamaxesha amaninzi, yiphumo.
I-Tween inokuthukuthela into encinane. Ibakala elivakalayo lokuhlola lingawabeka, njengokuba kunokungqubana nomhlobo, usuku olubi kwintsimi yebhola, okanye isicelo sokucoca igumbi lokulala.
Basenokuba nomsindo xa belahlekelwa ibhasi yesikolo, okanye bayakhohlwa ukubhala umsebenzi wabo wesikolo ngosuku.
Iziqhwaba ziqhelekileyo, kwaye akukho nto inokukhathazeka ngazo. Gcina ukhumbule ukuba xa i-tween isithukuthele, ifuna ukuba wonke umntu ayazi, ngoko-ke umnyango, ukukhupha, nokumemeza kungenzeka.
Ukuba i-tween yakho ibuhlungu okanye yabangela abanye okanye ingonakalise ipropati, kufuneka uqhagamshelane nomntwana wakho. Udokotela wengane wakho unokuncoma uqeqesho oluqeqeshiwe olungakunceda wena nomntwana wakho.
Ukuphendula Ukuqhuma komntwana wakho
Ukuqhaqhazela ngokuqhelekileyo komsindo, unokukunceda phakathi kwakho:
- Ukuhlala uzinzile xa i-kati yakho izama ukuthetha nawe. Ukuba uthe waba nomsindo oza kwenza ukuba umsindo wakhe uphelele.
- Gwema ukunikela ngeengcebiso ekuqaleni, vumela ukuba intetho yakho phakathi, kwaye ungagxeki okanye ugwebe.
- Yithi, "Ndiyazi ukuba unomsindo, ndinokunceda njani?" Ungatsho ukuthi, "Akuyinto enkulu enkulu. Yikhohlwa ngalo."
- Qinisekisa ukuba izakhono zakho zokuphulaphula zifikelela kumsebenzi. Zama ukuphazamisa phakathi kwakho njengoko echaza isizathu sokuba uphelelwe ngumsindo. Buza imibuzo ukuze ufumane ulwazi oluthe vetshe kwaye qiniseka ukugcina ilizwi lakho kakhulu, ukuzola.
- Gcina ukhumbule ukuba i-middle yakho ingabi nomsindo. Unokuba udaniwe, umona, uhlazekile okanye uloyike. Akunakwenzeka ukuba angazi indlela yokuphendula ngokufanelekileyo imeko ekhoyo, kwaye ke umsindo uya kuba ngumphumo. Ukumnceda ukuba aqonde iimvakalelo zakhe kuyisinyathelo sokuqala esihle sokufunda indlela yokuhlangabezana nayo.
- Qinisekisa ukuba i-kati yakho ithole ukulala ngokwaneleyo . Umntwana olahlwe ngokulala uya kuthukuthela kaninzi, ngenxa yokuba ukhathele kwaye akakwazi ukuhlangabezana nalo.
- Ukunikezela iziphakamiso ezinokunceda uhlangothi lwakho luzolile. Ukuba ulaka lwakho lwentliziyo lubonakala lukhula, cinga ngokukhawuleza ukuba athathe ixesha lakhe egumbini lakhe yedwa ukuze azinqabise aze azidibanise kunye.
- Abanye bafumana ukuba ukubhala, ukudweba, okanye ukuzisebenzisa kunokubanceda babhekane noxinezelo , umsindo, kunye nokudumala komntu. Kwakhona, ixesha elilodwa kunye nabahlobo linokukunceda, njengokuba kunokwenzeka ixesha elithile lithelevishini okanye ixesha lomdlalo wevidiyo.
- Vumela i-kati yakho ukuba ivule, kodwa ingabi kakhulu. Kukulungele ukuvuthela umphunga, kodwa ufuna ukuqiniseka ukuba i-kati yakho ayiyikutshisa umlilo kwaye uzenzele ingqumbo.
- Buza phakathi kwakho ukuba ucinge ukuba ungayithintela nayiphi na into eyayikukhathazayo. Ngaba ikhona na indlela yokuba ayiphathe kakuhle imeko okanye ayithintele ukuba ingabikho kwakhona?
- Jonga iincinci ezincinane njengoko ziqhelekileyo kwaye ziyinxalenye yokukhula. Umsebenzi wakho kukunceda phakathi kwakho kuphuhliswe izakhono zokukhusela ukuze akwazi ukuphucula indlela aphendula ngayo kwiimeko ezimbi kunye nokudumala.