Ukudibanisa iqela lokuxhasa abantwana abangenabantwana bangabakho indlela enkulu yokujamelana nokungafumaneki . Ukufumana inkxaso xa ujongene nokungafumaneki kubalulekile, kodwa akusoloko kulula. Abahlobo kunye nosapho banokunika inkxaso ethile, kodwa nabahlobo abakhulu kakhulu abanakukwazi ukuqonda ngokwenene oko uhambayo ngaphandle kokuba ufumane ukungabikho komntwana.
Iqela lokuxhasa linokunika indawo apho imibhangqwana inokudibana kunye nokuthetha nabantu abayiqondayo.
QHUBEKA: Umbutho weSizwe ongenakuncedo, inhlangano engenzi nzuzo inomsebenzi wokubonelela "ngexesha elifanelekileyo, inkxaso nenkxaso kubantu abanokungabikho kwengqondo," igcina inethiwekhi yezahluko zesithili kunye nabasebenzi abanomnqweno wokubonelela ngenkxaso yabantu basekhaya.
Ukuqhutywa ngokuyinhloko ngamavolontiya, FUNDA amaqela enkxaso ayatholakala kulo lonke elaseUnited States.
INDLELA INDLELA YOKUKHUBA I-Untiltilitative Support Groups Groups
U-Penny Joss Fletcher, umtshato kunye nosapho lweengcali ogqithiseleyo ukungabikho kwengqondo kunye nokwelulekwa kwabantwana, uyayiqonda imfuno yokuncedisa ukungabikho komntwana kwimeko yamava.
Emva kokuvalelwa kwangaphambili, uPenny waya kwintlanganiso yezemfundo ngokuphathelele izigulana ezingenasifo kunye neemvakalelo zabo. Kwintlanganiso, weva malunga ne-RESOLVE kwi-colleague kwaye wagqiba kwelokujonga.
"Nangona ndineentlobo ezininzi zabahlobo abazama ukuxhasa (kwaye bebazi indlela yokuba novelwano), bebengakaze bafumane ukungabikho kwengqondo," kuchaza uPenny.
"Ukuhlala kunye neqela labasetyhini abanokuthi bathethe izinto ezifanayo nabahlobo bam ogqithisileyo kodwa ke mna ndiyazi ukuba uyifumene, wayehluke ngokupheleleyo."
Xa uPenny eqala ukufumana iqela lokuxhasa i-RESOLVE, wayeseqalile uhambo lwakhe ngokunyanga nokungabikho kokunyanga . Waxhamla kumalungu anamava ngaphakathi kolwazi kwihlabathi lokungapheli, kodwa inkxaso yemoya ibaluleke kakhulu.
"Ndandifunde okuninzi malunga nezinto endikhethayo zonyango lwangomso, olwamnika ithemba elininzi. Kodwa ngokuyininzi, yayiyindawo endingayi kuyo nganye iveki ndize ndithethe malunga nokuba kwakunjani ukuba 'uphumelele' ngokungakhulelwa kwaye kungabi ngumama okwamanje. "
U-Penny uthi kwakhona kuye kwabanceda ukukhulula uxinzelelo emtshatweni wakhe. "Umyeni wam wayenomdla wokuva udizi kunye nokudumala, kodwa aba bafazi bebengekho! Kwathatha uxinzelelo kumyeni wam ukuba ndibe ngumxhasi wemoya kuphela. "
Indlela amaQela oNkxaso asebenza ngayo
INQUBO ihlinzeka ngamacandelo amabini amaqela enkxaso-okhokelwa ngabagqirha-okhokelwa nguPenny (kwaye ngoku uhamba naye, njengomcebisi), kunye namaqela okunxibelelanisa oontanga.
Amaqela ekunxibelelanisa oontanga ahlangana kanye ngenyanga, kwaye akhokelwa ngumntu onamava ongenasiphelo, kodwa kungekhona uchwepheshe.
Iintlanganiso ezikhokelwa yi-therapist zihamba ngokusemthethweni, zihlanganisane kanye ngeveki, kwaye ziquka umrhumo wokuya. Bakhokelwa ngumcebisi weengcali, kodwa abayilungu leyeza. Umcebisi ulapho ukuze ancedise ukuququzelela incoko kwaye uncede ukugcina imida ephilileyo kwiqela. Amaqela aphakathi kwabafazi okanye iibini kunye kwaye anqunywe ngobukhulu, ukubonelela ngexesha elaneleyo lokuba wonke umntu athethe.
Amaqela ngokuqhelekileyo adibana kwiiveki ezili-12, ngezihloko ezahlukahlukeneyo ezabelwe nganye iveki.
U-Penny uyachaza, "Izihloko zentlobo yabasetyhini abangabantwana abangabikhoyo okanye iibini zesibini ziquka ukunciphisa uxinzelelo, ukuzinyamekela, ukuxhalaba, nokuxinezeleka , ukujongana nosapho kunye nabahlobo, impembelelo kulwalamano lomtshato, ukhetho lwezonyango, ukuveliswa kweqela lesithathu, ukutholwa, kunye zokuhlala ezingenamntwana. Maxa wambi amaqela enza kwaye agxininise kwimiba ethile efana nokwamkelwa okanye ukuveliswa kweqela lesithathu. "
Nangona amaqela adibana ngokukodwa kanye ngeveki, abafazi okanye iibini eziseqenjini zikhuthazwa ukuba zihlangane ngaphandle kwendawo yokubeka iqela.
"Ndikhuthaza abathathi-nxaxheba ukuba baxhumane phakathi kweveki phakathi kweentlanganiso," kusho uPenny. "Ndifuna ukuba babe ngabahlobo!"
Indlela Yokufumana Iqela Lenkxaso Yengingqi
Ukufumanisa ukuba i-RESOLVE iqela lokuxhasa lifumaneka kwindawo yakho, tyelela iwebhusayithi ye-RESOLVE ukuze ufune ukuba yeyiphi indawo ohlala kuyo. Ummandla ngamnye unomxholo wewebhusayithi, apho ulwazi malunga namaqela enkxaso lufumaneka.
Amanye amabhinqa alwa nombono wokujoyina iqela lokuxhasa, kodwa ukuba unokudlulela kwiindawo zakho zokugcina, uya kuvuya xa wenza.
"Amaninzi amaninzi, abafazi baqala nje unyango abafuni ukujoyina iqela 'lokungazalanga' ngoba baqiniseke ukuba baya kukhulelwa ngenyanga ezayo," kuchaza uPenny. "Kodwa ndikhuthaza abo baqala ukuthatha inxaxheba ukuze bafumane inkxaso nenkcazelo abayifunayo kwiSuku Lunye.
"Ukuba bayakhulelwa, banokuyeka ukuthabatha inxaxheba kwiqela xa befuna. Ndinebafazi abaye baphathwa unyango kwiminyaka ekugqibeleni bathatha inxaxheba kwiqela leenkxaso, kwaye bahlala besithi banqwenela ukuba benze ngokukhawuleza! "U
Emva kweminyaka emihlanu yokuzama ukukhulelwa, kubandakanyeka omnye umjikelezo we-IVF , uPenny nomyeni wakhe bamkela umntwana. Kwiminyaka kamva, uqhubeka edibanisa nabantu abadibana naye ngexesha lakhe leqela lokuxhasa.
"Emva kweveki zethu ezili-12 zeqela kunye neengcali, sasiqhubeka sidibana kunye neminyaka emithathu ezayo de kube sonke sinomntwana omnye. Kwaye sinokuhlangana ngokuphindaphindiweyo ngonyaka (emva kweminyaka engama-14), kwaye abanye bethu kunye nezingane zethu zihlobo oluhle! "