Indlela Ukuzilawula Kukhokelela Ekuphumeleleni
Ihlabathi lanamhlanje lenza kube nzima kunanini ngaphambili ukufundisa abantwana ukulawula umfutho. Emva koko, sisetyenziselwa ukunyaniseka ngokukhawuleza.
Njengoko izitolo ziqhayisa, "Akukho mizila, akukho ukulinda," kunye neTV kwi-intanethi ikhusela ukuba singalindelanga kwiimveliso zeentengiso, sinamathuba ambalwa okwenza umonde.
Ukulawula umgudu, nangona kunjalo, kubalulekile ekuphumeleleni komntwana wakho. Akuzona zonke izinto ebomini ezenzeka ngokukhawuleza.
Ingaba umntwana wakho ufuna ukugcina imali yokuthenga okukhulu, okanye uzama ukufunda isakhono esitsha, ukuzithiba kukubalulekileyo.
Ulawulo lwe-Impulse Control lixhunyiwe kwiNtsebenzo yeSikolo
Abantwana abanokuzithiba bangakwazi ukuma ngokusemgangathweni, balinde ixesha labo xa bedlala umdlalo baze bacinge ngaphambi kokuba benze. Kananjalo banamathele ngakumbi ngontanga yabo kuba banako ukuxhathisa uxinzelelo lwabaontanga nokuxazulula iingxaki ngempumelelo.
Ukulawula umpembelelo kubangela ukuba uphumelele kwimfundo. Ukuzithiba kubaluleke ngokuphindwe kabili njengengqondo xa kufikelele kwimpumelelo yezemfundo, ngokuphathelele abaphandi benzululwazi uSandra Aamodt noSam Wang, ababhala ngokubhaliweyo "Siyakwamkela Ubomi Bomntwana Wakho."
Abantwana abangakwazi ukulawula iimpembelelo zabo bangakwazi ukucinga ngezimpendulo zabo ngaphambi kokuba babhale phantsi kwaye banokuba nezakhono zokucinga eziphambili zokulungisa iingxaki. Bangakwazi ukunyamezela ngakumbi xa bexazulula iingxaki ngokunjalo.
Uvavanyo lwe-Marshmallow
I-Stanford Marshmallow Testiment ibonisa ukubaluleka kokulawulwa kwengqondo kubantwana. Kwabandakanya uchungechunge lweemvavanyo ezenziwa ngowama-1960s no-1970 nguWalter Mischel, uprofesa kwiYunivesithi yaseStanford.
Abaphandi bavavanya ubuchule babantwana bokulibazisa ukuthotywa.
Abantwana abaphakathi kweminyaka engama-4 no-6 banikezwa ukhetho phakathi kwe-marshmallow enye okanye i-marshmallows emibini ngemizuzu eyi-15.
Uninzi lwabantwana bazama ukulinda imizuzu eyi-15 ukuze babe ne-marshmallows zombini. Nangona kunjalo, abaninzi babo banikela kwisilingo kwaye kuphela iipesenti ezingama-30 zabantwana baphumelela ekulibalekeni ukuxhaswa. Abo babekwazi ukulinda babonisa amandla okuphucula uxinzelelo nokulawula umsindo wabo .
Abantwana abaphumelele ukulibazisa ukuxhaswa babenako ukuphazamisa ngokwabo kwaye basebenzise ukuthetha ngokwabo kubaqeqeshi ngokwabo njengoko balinde. Abanye abantwana baphumelele ngokunciphisa isilingo. Ezinye izingane zenza sengathi i-marshmallow yayiyifu ngelixa abanye bethetha nje ukuba ngumfanekiso we-marshmallow endaweni yento yangempela.
Ukufunda ngokulandelelana kwabantwana ababenakho ukulibazisa ukuthotywa bafumene iingxaki zokuziphatha ezimbalwa. Babedume kakhulu kwiontanga zabo kwaye bakwazi ukugcina ubuhlobo ixesha elide.
Ulawulo lwazo lwengqondo lwabenza baphila kakuhle kamva ebomini. Abantwana abaye bakwazi ukulibazisa ukuthotyelwa kusenokuba babekho izikolo eziphezulu ze-SAT njengabaselula.
Ucwaningo lwe-2017 olupapashwe kwiincwadi zezoQoqosho lufumene ukuba ukuzithiba komntwana kubangelwa ukuba umntu uya kuba negalelo kwisicwangciso somhlala-phantsi njengomntu omdala.
Abaphengululi baphetha ukuzithiba kobuntwaneni kubangelwa ukuba ama-4 ukuya kuma-5 eepesenti aphezulu amathuba okuba nempensheni.
Ulawulo oluqhelekileyo lokuLawula umda
Nantsi into onokuyilindela kumntwana wakho kwinqanaba ngalinye lophuhliso:
- Abantwana abaselula - Abantwana abakwazi ukulawula ukunyanzeliswa phantse kuzo zonke iinkalo zobomi babo. Baziphosa phantsi, bazikhabe, okanye batshabalale ngaphandle kokubheka kwaye oku kuqhelekileyo. Nangona kunjalo, lixesha elihle lokuqala ukufaka ingcamango yomonde kumntwana wakho.
- Abantwana besikolo samabanga ase-Preschool - abantwana be-Preschool kufuneka babonise uburhala obuncinane kwaye kufuneka babe nokufumana iingxaki zokulungisa ingxaki. Nangona kunjalo, kuyinto evamile ukuba baqhubeke bexakeka ngokukhawuleza, kubandakanywa ugonyamelo.
- Abafundi beBanga lesikolo - abantwana besikolo seBakala kufuneka babe ne-handle management ngokulawula ngokunyanzeliswa xa befika emzimbeni wabo. Ngokuqhelekileyo banako ukuthatha into ethile esandleni somntu kwaye kufuneka bakwazi ukuphendula kwingxaki ngaphandle kokuziphatha kakubi . Kuqhelekile ukuba balwe nemigudu yokuthetha, njengokuba abaninzi babo baqhubeka bethetha kakubi okanye baphendule ngaphandle kokucinga.
- Iintsholongwane - Nangona ininzi intsha ingathanda ukuthetha ukuba ilawulwa ngokupheleleyo kwimpembelelo yabo, akunakwenzeka. Xa kuthelekiswa nabantu abadala, intsha ithambekele ekubeni yingozi yokuthatha ingxaki, ukukhathazeka kakhudlwana ngokomzwelo, kwaye kunobungozi beengcinezelo zontanga. Ukukhula kwabo ubuchopho kuyaqhubeka kubangela ukuba bagxininise ngakumbi kwiifutshane zexesha elide kunokuba kube nemiphumo emide ngexesha elide.
Fundisa Ukuzilawula
Ukulawula umgudu akusiyo impawu yendalo. Ikhono elifundiweyo ukuba nayiphi na umntwana angakwazi ukuphuhlisa kodwa kufuneka ufundise ngokuzenzekelayo izakhono zokulawula umntwana .
Ngokusebenza kunye nokhokelo, uya kuphucula amandla akhe okucinga ngaphambi kokuba enze. Kwaye uya kuba nokukhusela iingxaki ezininzi zokuziphatha ngaphambi kokuba ziqale .
Imithombo:
I-Aamodt S, Wang S. Siyakwamukela kwiBongo Yomntwana Wakho. ENew York, NY. EBroomsbury USA. 2012.
Casey, BJ, et al. (2011). Ukuziphatha kunye ne-coral correlates yokulibaziseka kokuxhaswa iminyaka engama-40 kamva. Iinkqubo zeSizwe seSizwe seSayensi, 108 (36), 14998-15003.
Lades LK, Egan M, Delaney L, uDaly M. Childhood ukuzithiba nokuthatha inxaxheba yabantu abadala. IiNcwadi zoQoqosho . 2017; 161: 102-104.