Indlela yokuxelela abantwana apho iintsana zivela khona
"Mama, zivelaphi iintsana?"
Nguwuphi umbuzo onokubangela ukwesaba nangona umzali oqhubela phambili. Ngezinye iinkcukacha, umbuzo uza kuphuma ebomvu, kwaye umzali uya kuziva ephosakeleyo, engaqinisekanga ukuba uthetha okanye nokuba ungathini na.
Umbuzo unokuthi ukhuthazwe kukuba uyakhulelwa okanye umntu omaziyo usanda kubantwana. Kungokwemvelo ukuba umntwana abe nolwazi xa ejongene nalezi zinto.
Ngethuba i-instinct yakho yokuqala ingaba ukujika kwiincwadana-iklabishi, iigorks, kunye nezinye-ngaba ufuna ngokwenene ukuya khona?
Qala ngokuzikhumbuza oku: ukukhathazeka kwakho akukona umntwana wakho. Ngokubanzi, abantwana abanalo ukuphendulela kwamagolo afanayo kwizesondo okanye kwiindawo zomzimba abantu abadala abazenzayo. Abazihlaziyi okanye bahlazeke ngaphandle kokuba ihlazo okanye intloni ixhunywe ngqo okanye ngokungathanga ngqo kubo.
Ukuba uthe wagqithwa, thabatha imizuzu embalwa ukuba uzenzele. Yenza inkomishi yeeyi uze ufumane indawo apho wena nomntwana wakho ningaphila kakuhle ngaphandle kokwenza into enkulu. Emva kokuhlala, kukho ezintlanu izinto onokuzenza ukukunceda ekukhombiseni:
1. Phendula umbuzo ocela umntwana
Isihluthulelo sokuphendula nayiphi na imibuzo yolu hlobo kukuphulaphula ngokuchanekileyo uze uqaphele kanye into efunwa ngumntwana. Ngamanye amaxesha, njengabazali, siya kugxuma isibhamu size siphambuke ngokupheleleyo kwicala elingalunganga.
Ngokomzekelo, ngelixa umntwana oneminyaka emithathu ubudala oneminyaka engama-6 unokubuza umbuzo ofanayo, umxholo uya kuba uhlukile. Umntwana oneminyaka emithathu unokufuna ukwazi indlela umntwana ephuma ngayo esiswini sakho, ngelixa uneminyaka engama-6 ubudala unokubuza ukuba umntwana wenza njani.
Mamela ngokukhawuleza, kwaye uya kuba neenkcukacha zokuqala malunga nendlela yokuphendula umbuzo ngendlela efanelekileyo.
2. Mbonise into eyenziwa nguNyana
Ngokuqhelekileyo kusemgangathweni ukuseka ukuqonda kokusisiseko ngaphambi kokuqalisa ingxoxo. Qala ngokubuza imibuzo embalwa ukucacisa izinga lokuqonda lomntwana kunye nento enokucinga ukuba ukhulelwe ngayo. Ukuxoxa ngokungaqhelekanga kuya kukunika ingcamango yokuba yiyiphi amagama okuyisebenzisa kunye nendlela yokusebenzisa ukuqonda kwengane ukuzalisa izikhalazo ngokubambisana.
Hlala ulinganisa iimpendulo zakho ngamazwi umntwana wakho asebenzise kakade kwaye aqonde. Ukuba usebenzisa igama elingenako umntwana, lichaze ngokungangoko unako. Impendulo elula, ngokuthe ngqo kuya kubakho kwimibandela eyongezelelweyo okanye ukungaqondani.
3. Qaphela xa ukhetha amagama akho
Ukusebenzisa amagama angafanelekanga okanye amazwi ngamanye amaxesha kunokwesabisa abantwana. Ukuba uceliwe, umzekelo, indlela umntwana ephuma ngayo kwaye achaze icandelo lokumvalela ngamagama athi "nqunyiwe," umntwana uya kuphazamiseka okanye ngokugqithiseleyo.
Kuyafana nakwisigqibo sokuba usebenzisa imigaqo ethile okanye ngokubanzi. Umzekelo, ukuchaza isisu (okanye isizalo) kuvumela umntwana ukuba aqonde ukuba ihluke kwisisu okanye esiswini. Ngale ndlela, akusayi kubakho ukudideka malunga nokuba umntwana unokuthi "ukhulelwe" esiswini sakhe.
Okukhethwa nguwe kodwa ukhethe ngokucophelela.
4. Musa ukucinga ukuba kufuneka uphendule yonke into ngexesha
Okuyinkimbinkimbi umbuzo, ngaphezulu kokufuna ukucinga ngako ngaphambi kokuba uphendule. Ungesabi ukuxelela umntwana wakho udinga ixesha elifutshane lokufumana impendulo enhle.
Ukuba awukwazi, thola incwadi yabantwana echaza ukuphuhliswa komntwana kwisimo esifanelekileyo. Ngale ndlela, umntwana angenza ubudlelwane phakathi kwakho nomama kule ncwadi. Ikuvumela ukuba uhlanganyele umzuzwana kwaye uchanile ngexesha elifanayo.
5. Hlonipha
Ingumlinganiselo omdala, kodwa uyinyaniso: Ukunyaniseka ngumgaqo-nkqubo ophambili.
Nangona unokuziva ungakhululekile malunga neemeko zonke, ukuphepha ingxoxo okanye ukuthetha ubungqina buza kubonisa kuphela ukuba umntwana unento engalunganga. Unokuba neentloni okanye iintloni apho kungekho mntu okanye ukholelwa ukuba umbuzo wawungalunganga okanye ungalunganga.
Uyazi umntanakho mhle kwaye unomqondo ongokwemvelo wento anako ukuyisebenzisa. Kodwa, kufuneka uqikelele ukuba iimvakalelo zakho zingabonakaliyo kumbala amagama akho. Ngokuhlala usinyanisekile-kwaye ungafikeleli kwiinganekwane-unokukunceda umntwana wakho akhule ubudlelwane obuhle nomzimba womntu, ukukhulelwa, kunye nesondo.