Funda ukuba kutheni ubuntwaba obunobunzima bangela ukuba iingxaki zenzeke
Ukutshatyalaliswa kwintshukumo yinto enzima kunoma yimuphi na phakathi, kodwa abanye abantwana bafumana nzima kunabanye. Abantwana abaqala ukutshatyalaliswa kuncinci kunontanga yabo banomngeni onzima ukujamelana nawo. Ukubuthwa kwangaphambili, okanye ukutshatyalaliswa kwintsapho, kuya kuba yinto eqhelekileyo ngakumbi, yintoni abazali abafanele bayayazi ukuba umntwana uqala ukutshatsana esemncinci kakhulu.
Impembelelo engalunganga
Impembelelo engafanelekanga yobuntwabuntwana bokuqala ebantombazaneni ibhalwe ngokucacileyo, kwaye abazali be-tween abahamba ngokubaluleka kwangaphambili bafuna lonke ulwazi abanokufumana ukuze bancede ngakumbi umntwana wabo kwaye banokuphepha iingxaki ezinokuba nazo.
Nazi ezi zintathu ezixutyushwa ngokubanzi malunga nokuba kutheni ubuntwaba obunobuncwane buba nemiphumo emibi phakathi kwamantombazana.
Ngokukhawuleza kakhulu
Ezinye izazi zeengqondo zikholelwa ukuba ukuphuhliswa kufuneka kwenzeke ngendlela ethile ukuze kulunge. Ngokomzekelo, abantwana kufuneka babe nolwazi olunzulu lwezentlalo, iingqondo kunye neemvakalelo ngaphambi kokuba bakulungele ukunyamezela ubunzima bokukhula. Ukuba ukukhulelwa kubakho kusasa kakhulu, basenokuba bazalise ukuphuhliswa kwengqondo okufunekayo yobuntwaneni xa kufika ubusuku. Ngenxa yoko, amantombazana asekuqaleni anokugxininiswa ngabaxinzelelo bebuntutsha kunye neenguqu ezininzi ezihamba nobudlelwane . Ngenxa yoko, ukutshatyalaliswa kwentsha kumantombazana kunempembelelo embi. Kukho ubungqina bophando ekuxhaseni le nkcazo, ebizwa ngokuba "isigaba sokupheliswa kweengcamango". Ngokukodwa, i-tween yokuqala yokukhula ibonakala ibangelwa ukuxinezeleka kunokuba iontanga zabo ziqulunqa.
Ukuziva Uhluke Kontanga
Ukuziva uhlukile koontanga ngumngeni onzima rhoqo kubantu abantombazana kunye nabashumi kwaye akumangalisi ukuba amantombazana ahamba ngokutshatyalaliswa kungekudala kunokuba oontanga bakhe banokuzifanisa nabanye. Le nkcazo, ebizwa ngokuthi "ukuguquka kweengcamango", igxininisa ukuba nayiphi na ikhefu ukusuka kwinqanaba lexesha eliphambili lophuhliso lugxininisa.
Ngamanye amazwi, abantwana nabantwana bahamba phambili xa befumana ama-epestones amanyathelo okuphuhliswa ngexesha elifanayo kunye neontanga zabo. Ukuxhasa le ngqungquthela, kuye kwafunyaniswa ukuba bobabini abasakhulayo nabasakhulayo bebandezelekile banokudandatheka ngakumbi kunokuba "bexesha elifanelekileyo" abaselula.
Ukufumana ezininzi iindlela zokutshintshwa ngexesha elilodwa
Ekugqibeleni, ezinye izazi zengqondo zikholelwa ukuba uxinzelelo lweenguqu zangexesha elifanayo lichaza kakuhle impembelelo engafanelekanga yobuntombi bokuqala. Abaxhasi be-"hypothesis" yokuguquguquka kwezinto ezininzi baxabana ukuba ukwenza okulungileyo xa bekunye kuphela ukujongana nomnye okanye ezimbini ezibalulekileyo zokuguqula ubomi nangaliphi na ixesha. Ukuba ubusuku bufika ngokukhawuleza ukuba luhambelane nezinye iinguqulelo-ezifana nokuguquka ukusuka kwisikolo esiphakathi ukuya kwisikolo esiphakathi- ke u-pakati angase abe noxinzelelo olukhulu kunontanga yakhe. Kukho inkxaso yophando malunga nale ngcamango. Ngokomzekelo, amakhwenkwe aqolileyo malunga nokuqala kokuphezulu afunyaniswe ukuba axineke ngakumbi kunabo bafumana ukutshatyalaliswa kancinci kamva.
Kutheni le nto icinga ngento
Kukho konke, okwangoku ngokucacileyo ukuba kutheni ukuqala ukubeleka kusenokuba nefuthe elinjalo kumanqanaba, kunye nokudala imingeni eninzi kwiintsapho.
Ngophando olongezelelweyo, izazinzulu zingaphawula ukuba zeziphi iingcamango-okanye ukudibanisa kwazo-zinika inkcazelo engcono. Xa besenza, siya kuthemba ukuba sifunde indlela efanelekileyo yokulwa nemiphumo ephazamisayo yobusana. Oku kubaluleke ngokugqithiseleyo xa ubusuku bokuqala bukhula buba nzima .
Qaphela: Ukuba umntwana wakho uhamba ebusweni obunobunzima kubalulekile ukunxibelelana nayiphi na ingxaki ebantwaneni bakho abajamelana nayo nengane yakhe. Ugqirha lomntwana wakho uya kukwazi ukukunceda ukuba uqonde indlela ekuncedeni ngayo. Ukujongana nemingeni kunye nokukhathazeka ngogqirha wengane yakho kwaye ube khona ukuphulaphula xa i-kati yakho idinga ukuvula malunga nayiphi na imingeni engayiqondi.
Eli nqaku lahlaziywa ngoJulayi 9, 2016, nguJennifer O'Donnell.
Umthombo:
Ge, Xiaojia, Conger, Rand, & Elder, Jr., Glen. Ubudlelwane phakathi kobuntwaba kunye noxinzelelo lwengqondo kwiintwazana eziselula. Umbhalo woPhando malunga noLutsha. 2001. 11: 49-70.