Ngokuxhomekeka kwindlela ekukude ngayo ngexesha lakho lokulahlekelwa, uya kuba nokukhetha okuninzi malunga nento omele uyenze ngokujonga umntwana wakho. Nangona kunjalo, nasiphi na isigaba sokulahleka kokukhulelwa , unokufumana-kwaye unokufuna ukuba-umngcwabo okanye inkonzo yesikhumbuzo.
Ngelo xesha, abanye abantu abafuni ukuba nomngcwabo. Ukuba nguwe lona, zihloniphe kunye nezifiso zakho.
Akukho nto neyiphutha xa kuziwa kwimingcwabo emva kokusweleka komzimba okanye ukuzalwa komntwana, kwaye yintoni elona nto ilungileyo eyenza oko kukulungele wena, kungekhona into eyona nto ingcono kunomnye umntu.
Kutheni Umngcwabo?
Imingcwabo yinxalenye ebalulekileyo kwinkqubo yokulila abantu abaninzi, indlela yokuthetha nokunyusa imemori yothandekayo. Kungathi kunzima ukufumana igumbi elizele abantu ukujongana nabo, kodwa unokufumana lula ukujongana nabantu bonke ngexesha elifutshane.
Umngcwabo unokukunceda ukuba ufumane ukuvalwa, kwaye ube yinye yezinyathelo zokufumana ukuphulukana nomoya okanye ukuzalwa kwangokuzalwa. Nangona usenokuba uthethe i-goodbyes yakho esibhedlele, unokufumana umngcwabo ube yinto yokugqibela kunye neyanelisayo. Ngokuxhomekeke kwindlela ekukude ngayo ngexesha lakho lokulahlekelwa, kwaye ngokukodwa kwiintsana ezisweleyo , unokufumana ithuba lokubona umntwana wakho okokugqibela.
Isenzo sokukhetha onke amalungiselelo akho okugqibela angabangela unyango ngenxa yezizathu ezininzi.
Ikunika ithuba lokwenza izigqibo kumntwana wakho xa ezininzi zezigqibo zithathwe kuwe. Ukususela ekucwangcisweni komngcwaba into esetyenziswa ngayo emva kokufa, kunokukunceda ukuba uvumelane nokulahlekelwa ngokukhawuleza.
Musa Ukuziva Ukhutshiwe
Akuqhelekanga ukuthatha ixesha elide ngeveki ukugqiba onke amalungiselelo omngcwabo.
Kukulungele ukuthatha ixesha elide njengoko ufuna. Qinisekisa ukuxelela intsapho kunye neentsapho ezinentsingiselo ezifanelekileyo ukuba ufuna ukwenza ukhetho, kungakhathaliseki ukuba kuthatha ixesha elingakanani, okanye banokucinga ukuba uphazamiseke kwaye uzama ukuthatha ucwangciso. Ungavumi ukuba umntu akhuphele kwinkonzo phambi kokuba unelisekile kuzo zonke izigqibo zakho-ngakumbi ekubeni wena, unina, uya kuphulukana nokuphulukiswa kwakho . Ufanele uzive kakuhle ngokwaneleyo ukuba uhlale ngeenkonzo kwaye uphumule kakuhle ngokwaneleyo ukuze ubhekane neentsapho kunye nabahlobo bakho.
Yithembele Izikhokelo Zakho
Abalawuli abaninzi bamangcwaba banomdla kakhulu kwiimfuno zabazali neemfuno zabo. Ukuba ufuna ukubandakanya ukugqoka umntwana wakho kumngcwabo, yithetha njalo. Ukuba awufuni, musa ukunyanzeliswa. Unokucela ukuba abasebenzi basekhaya lokungcwaba bathathe iinyawo ezingaphezulu okanye baqokelele iinqwelo zeenwele, ukuba kunokwenzeka. Ukuba ufuna imifanekiso yentsana yakho nganoma ikuphi kumalungiselelo okanye ngexesha lomngcwabo, thetha. Unokufuna ukumisela umhlobo ukusebenzisa ikhamera. Ungavumeli abanye abantu ukuba bakuxelele ukuba akufanelekanga okanye kuphazamiseke. Abantu abaninzi bathatha imifanekiso, kwaye bafumanisa ezi zinto ziduduza kamva, nangona baqala ukudikibala ukwenza njalo ngabahlobo okanye intsapho enentsingiselo.
Into ebalulekileyo ukugcina engqondweni kukuba umngcwabo yindlela yakho yokuzihlonela wena kunye nosana lwakho, kungekhona lomnye umntu. Ukuba unenkonzo ingaba mfutshane okanye ixesha elide njengoko ukhetha. Abanye abantu bafumana intsingiselo ekufundeni kobuKristu inkonzo, kanti abanye bakhetha ukufundwa okungabikho kwenkolo . Kuyafaneleka nokuba uthanda kuphela umzuzu wokuthula. I-ajenda yakho ayidingi ukuba idabuke. Ngelixa uhlonipha umntwana wakho, umngcwabo uthethelelwe abo baphila, kungekhona abo baphile. Yenze ibe yakho.
Ndingabaphi na uMngcwabo?
Unokuba nomngcwaba naluphi na indawo oziva ukhululekile.
Ikhaya lokungcwaba liya kuba namakamelo okubuka, okanye unokwenza amalungiselelo necawa yakho. Unako nokuba nenkonzo emfutshane emangcwabeni ukuba unomntwana wakho wangcwatywa. Ezinye iintsapho zikhetha ukuba nenkonzo ekhaya okanye kwindawo kawonkewonke, njengelwandle okanye ingadi. Qiniseka ukuba ucacise ngomlawuli wakho womngcwabo onoxanduva lokufumana nayiphi na imvume evumelekileyo, ukuba uceba ukusebenzisa indawo zoluntu.
Umngcwabo ungaba ngamava amahle kunye neyindlela ezuzisayo kumendo wakho ngeentlungu. Ingaba unesisu okanye ubeletha, unokufumana umcimbi okhethekileyo wokuhlonela inkumbulo yengane yakho-nokuba ingaba yinto engacwangciswanga kunye nekhaya lakho.
Ukuhlonela Umntwana Wakho
Ingaba okanye ukhetha ukhetha umngcwabo, kukho ezinye iindlela onokumhlonela ngayo umntwana wakho. Nazi iimbono ezimbalwa zesikhumbuzo , kunye nezinye iindlela ezahlukileyo zokuqinisekisa ukuba umntwana wakho akakalibali.
Imithombo:
I-Capitulo, K. Ubungqina bokuPhulukiswa kokuPhulukiswa kokuPhumela kwePerinatal. MCN. Umbhalo waseMerika woNyango lwaBantwana bamaMama . 2005. 39 (6): 389-96.
UDonovan, uL., Wakefield, C., Russell, V., noR. Cohn. IiNkonzo zokuNyulwa kweziBhedlele eziBhedlela emva kokufa komntwana: UkuHlola okuHlangeneyo. Uncedo lweMpilo . 2015. 29 (3): 193-210.