Sithetha nabantwana malunga nokubaluleka kokungabaniki ekunyanzelekeni koontanga, kodwa abaninzi bethu abanokungaqondi ukuba sinokuthintela njani thina ngabanye abazali. Nangona kuninzi kuncedo ukufumana iingcebiso kunye nolwazi oluvela kwabanye abazali, ngamanye amaxesha sinokutshatyalaliswa ngaphezu kokuba siqaphele uxinzelelo lwabaontanga.
Ngokomzekelo, abazali abangacingi ukuba abaneminyaka engama-7 ubudala kufuneka babone iifrimu ezilinganisiwe i-PG-13 banokuziva bexinzelelwe ukuba bamvumele ukuba aye kwiqela apho ifilimu ye-PG-13 iya kuboniswa; kwaye ukuba le filimu yinto efana ne "Dark Knight," kwaye xa umntwana wakho evuka ekhwaza kwaye ehamba ngeeveki emva koko, akuyona into enhle.
Kanye njengokuba abazali banokuxelela umntwana ukuba kufuneka azame ukungavumeli uxinzelelo lwabaontanga kuthonya izenzo zakhe, kuba abazali bafuna ukugcina engqondweni. Kwaye njengoko kunokuba nzima kakhulu ukulwa nomzila wamanzi, kunokuba nzima kubantu abadala ukuba nabo benze njalo.
Indlela Yokuthetha Nokuba Uyashukunyiswa Ngabaxinzelelo Bontanga
Ngexesha elizayo xa uziva unyanzelekile ekwenzeni ukhetho okanye ukwenza into ongazivakalelwa kukuba umntwana wakho okanye intsapho yakho, zibuze le mibuzo ebalulekileyo:
- Ingaba isigqibo sakho sisekelwe kumava okanye kwienkolelo zakho? Okanye ngaba uhlala uguqa komnye umntu? Ingaba isisombululo sakho somzali oko ucinga ukuba uyona nto ibaluleke kakhulu kumntwana wakho nakwintsapho yakho okanye ngaba yinto enokwenzayo ukuze uvumelane nabanye abazali kwiqela lakho lentlalontle? Xa usenza umnxeba malunga nento-ithi, indlela yokusingatha ukungahloneli okanye ukuba ngaba abantwana bamele baphuze i-soda-cingisisa malunga nesisigqibo sakho. Ukuba ngaba nawuphi na wabazali kwinqanaba lakho lezentlalo okanye kwintsapho yakho besithi i-soda ngosuku ngomntwana kodwa ucinga ukuba i-sugary sodas ayimpilo yezingane , zibambelele kwizibhamu zakho. Umntwana wakho mhlawumbi uya kubhikisha ukuba amanye abantwana avunyelwe ukuba abe ne-soda rhoqo, kodwa unokuchaza ukuba oku kukucinga ukuba kukulungele impilo yakhe kwaye kukulungele intsapho yakho.
- Ngaba ukhetha kwakho umphumo wophando lwakho kwisihloko? Ingaba kukho ukuzimela ngokukhululekileyo ukunika abantwana, nokuba yeyiphi na i-kids access access tech, kwaye kukho naziphi na ezinye izihloko ezinomtsalane ezinokutshatyalaza ezivame ukuvelisa impikiswano, kukho uphando oluninzi apho ukuze bancede abazali babe neengcamango zabo malunga khupha. Ngokomzekelo, ukuba ngabahlobo okanye amalungu omndeni axhasa ukutyhulwa kodwa awuvumelani ukuba ubungqina obunzima bubonisa ukuba isohlwayo esinomntu sinokuchaphazela ngokucacileyo kunye nemiphumo emibi kubantwana, yenza ukhetho lwakho olusekelwe kwiinyaniso kunokuba abanye abazali bakholwe.
- Ngaba wenza okulungileyo kumntwana wakho kunye nobuntu bakhe kunye nokukhetha? Lo ngumbuzo obalulekileyo ukuzibuza xa wenza isinqumo somzali. Ukuba umntwanakho uyamthiya amafilimu angcaqisayo kodwa umcimbi wokuzalwa uyamenywa ukuba abe nefilimu ene-spooky, umzekelo, ungazivumeli ukuba uqiniseke ukuba wenze umntwana wakho ahambe. Kubalulekile ukuhlonipha iimfuno zomntu ngamnye, kwaye ukunyamekela koxinzelelo lwabaontanga kubonisa umntwana wakho ukuba unokusingatha njani uxinzelelo lwabavela kwezinye iikratshi xa kwenzeka kuye.
- Ngaba izenzo zakho zingathintekanga ngento abanye abazali abazenzayo kuwe? Ngamanye amaxesha, sinokuhamba kunye ukuze sihambelane, kwaye singaqapheli ukuba senza izinto esiqhelekileyo ukuba singayifanelekiyo. Ngokomzekelo, ukuba uphantsi kwimeko apho abazali bephuza utswala obukhulu, unokuba nosela oluninzi kunokuba ubenokuyenza ekhaya.
- Ingaba isigqibo sakho singalimaza kumntwana okanye wena? Oku kubaluleke kakhulu ukuzibuza. Ukuba ukhona, zithi, kuloo ndawo apho kukho ukusela amaninzi okuqhubekayo kwaye abazali abayikunyamekela abantwana abadlala edibanini lokubhukuda, le yimeko eyingozi kubantwana. Ngokuthi hayi utshwala kwaye uhlala kufuphi ne-pool-kwaye uthetha kwaye ukhuthaze umphathi wakho ukuba ube nomzali ongenakulingatha ukuba abe ngumgcini-wokhuseleko-unokuthintela ingozi embi kwaye eyingozi.
- Ngaba uxinzelelo lontanga luya kukuqondisa ekuziphatheni awuncedisi okanye ufuna ukuyingxenye? Ukuba ngaba abanye abazali obenokusebenzisana nabo babenza njengamantombazana athetha, ukuhleba, okanye ukuziphatha kwezinye iindlela ezimbi kunye nezityhefu, kukukhetha ukuba uhambe kunye nento enokuziva ungalunganga okanye ukuzimela wena ukujongana nokungahambi kakuhle ngendlela efanelekileyo, njengokuzama ukuziphatha kakubi ngendlela efanelekileyo.
Indlela yokulwa noxinzelelo lwabazali
Njengabantu, sonke siphefumlelwe kwaye sithonywe omnye nomnye. Nantsi into ongayenza ukuqinisekisa ukuba uchaphazelekayo kwiindlela ezilungileyo:
- Zibuze ukuba ngaba uxinzelelo lwabazali luyathonya into ekugqibeleni ilungile okanye imbi kuwe nomntwana wakho. Ngokomzekelo, ukuba abanye abazali baneengcebiso ezinkulu zenkonzo zokukunceda ukuba umntwana wakho alele embhedeni okanye ulungelelanise indlela yakho yokusa , yinto yokumkela ekhaya lakho. Ukuba ngaba abazali kwindawo yakho, isikolo, okanye icawa okanye iisinagoge okanye elinye iqela lenkolo okanye yoluntu liza kunye ukuze lizivolontiye kwaye lincede abanye okanye basebenze kwiprojekthi yokunceda, kuyinto enhle ukuphefumlelwa kwaye ungene. kwinqanaba lakho lezentlalo bavumela abantwana babo ukuba baphuze utshwala kwisikolo samabanga amabakala ngenzame yokufumana abantwana abanomdla ongeyomfuneko wokusela (into eyenziwa ngokuphandle ngokucacileyo ayifuni kwaye ayithinteli ukusela utywala emva koko), yithi cha.
- Yenza uluhlu lwengqondo lokujonga amandla akho omzali. Zithembele kuwe kunye nezigqibo zakho. Ngaba unako ukufumana isidlo esilungileyo kwitafile ngobusuku obuninzi kwaye uqokelele wonke umntu kunye nesidlo seentsapho ? Ngaba uyayiphulaphula umntanakho kwaye umenze azive ngathi ungumntu onokuzimela kuye ? Ngaba unolwalamano olomeleleyo nomntwana wakho? Bala zonke izinto ozenzayo njengomzali kwaye uthembele wena.
- Xelela umzali okanye abazali abazama ukukwenza ukuba utshintshe ingqondo yakho malunga nento oyithandayo umdla wabo, kodwa ukuba uya kuhlonipha ngendlela yakho. Amathuba kukuba, mhlawumbi bacinga ukuba bazama ukuba luncedo. Kodwa qiniseka malunga nesigqibo sakho kwaye uchaze ukuba yinto enqwenele ukuba yenzele yona wena nomntwana wakho kwaye yinto oye uyiqwalasela ngenyameko. Buza ukuba bahloniphe isigqibo sakho njengoko uhlonipha ukhetho lwabo. Emva koko, fumana izinto ovumelana ngazo kwaye ugxininise kule miba yobudlelwane bakho.
- Khumbula ukuba ubeka umzekelo kumntwana wakho ukuba uya kulandela xa kufuneka asebenze izinto ezifana neenkcazo kunye noxinzelelo lwaontanga. Indlela ojongana ngayo noxinzelelo lwabazali uya kufundisa umntwana wakho indlela yokusingatha uxinzelelo lwaontanga ebomini bakhe.