Iimpawu kunye nemikhwa abazali abahle benzayo
Ziziphi iimpawu abazali abafanelekileyo abanalo? Ngaba kukho izinto ezithile umntu akwenzayo ezenza umzali omhle (okanye umzali omhle)?
Kakade ke, inkcazo yomzali omhle akuyona into echanekileyo okanye eyiyo. Izinto ezinokubonakala zifana neempawu zomzali omhle kumntu oyedwa onokungafanelanga loo ngcaciso kumnye umntu. Kodwa ngokuqhelekileyo uthetha, ezi mpawu kunye nemikhwa ingafumaneka kubazali abenza isakhono esihle sokubeletha.
Yintoni Eyenza Umzali Olungileyo?
1. Isikhokelo kunye nenkxaso - ayiyikunyusa kwaye ifune. Abazali ngokwemvelo bafuna ukuba abantwana babo baphumelele, kwaye banokubethisa, baxhase, bathabathe, bafune, okanye basongela abantwana ngokujeziswa ukuba basebenzise isixhobo, bavelele kwimidlalo, bafeze amabanga aphezulu njalonjalo. Inyaniso kukuba, ukuba ngumama weTiger (okanye uTata) akunakwenzeka ukuba umntwana wakho aqhubeke ngaphezu kokunika abantwana inkxaso eninzi, kwaye ngokukhawuleza ukugubungela ukuba kwaye xa beyidinga. Ukufumana ixesha xa ufuna ukuhamba kunye nexesha lokuvumela ukuba uhambe, funda, " Umama weTiger okanye umama wamaKitty? Xa ufuna ukuphumelela abantwana ukuba baphumelele, nini na ukuhamba."
2. Iifana mazibe zimele. Abazali abalungileyo bayazi ukuba kubalulekile ukuba abantwana benze izinto ngokwabo. Ingaba ngumsebenzi wesikolo okanye imisebenzi okanye ukwenza abahlobo , into engcono kakhulu esinokuyenza njengabazali ifumana abantwana kwindawo apho bayakwazi ukujongana nabo ngokwabo. Ngamanye amaxesha kunzima ukuxelela ukuba sinokuthi sincede kangakanani kwaye sinokuthi sivumele ukuba abantwana bathande into ethile ngokwabo, kodwa njengomgaqo jikelele, ukunceda umntwana wakho ngento ethile kakuhle xa uyenza ngenjongo yokugqibela yokufundisa ekugqibeleni yenze ngokwabo.
(Umzekelo, akusiyo ingcamango enhle kubazali, bathi, yenza umsebenzi wesikolo somntwana kuye okanye uhambele umhla wokudlala kwaye ulandelele ngokucacileyo oko abantwana abaza kudlala kunye nokuba yintoni - leyo yimizekelo ecacileyo yokukhusela i-helicoptering, engancedi. ukuba ubonisa umntwana ukuba asebenze njani ingxaki yomsebenzi wesikolo okanye ukulungisa ingxaki kumhlobo ngendlela ehloniphekileyo, unikezela umntwana wakho izixhobo ezintle kwixesha elizayo.) Ngezinye iinkcukacha malunga nendlela oza kuxelela ngayo xa "i-helicopter" umzali, kwaye xa usinceda, funda, "Ngaba uyi-Helicopter Parenting okanye Uncedo?
3. Khumbula ukuba abantwana bahlala bebukele. Ufumene ingqungquthela yeentlebi ezinobungozi oza kufa? Ufuna ukutshilo ummelwane owenze into ekhohlakeleyo okanye ecaphukisayo okanye ekhwaza umqhubi osiqhelile? Nangona singenakuhlala sigqibelele, umzali ngamnye owaziyo uyazi ukuba abantwana bahlala befunda kwimimiselo esiyibekayo. Ukuba sifuna ukuba abantwana bethu babe nomusa , babone uvelwano , kwaye bahlonipheke njengoko bekhula, kufuneka sizame ukuziphatha kwethu kwaye sibahlonele abanye.
4. Awuzange athethe, athabathe, okanye athobise abantwana bawo. Ingaba umzali angahle alahlekelwe ngumsindo wakhe okanye athwale ? Ngokuqinisekileyo - singabantu, emva koko. Kodwa ukuhlambalaza okanye ukuhlazisa okanye ukunyanzela umntwana akusoze kube yinto enhle yokufundisa nantoni na. Ngaba ufuna ukuphathwa ngale ndlela?
5. Bonisa abantwana babo ababathandayo imihla ngemihla. Sonke sinokuxakeka kakhulu, kulula ukulibala ukuthabatha ixesha lokubonisa abantwana bethu indlela esiziva ngayo ngabo. Imizimba emincinci, njengokubhala incwadi encinci yebhokisi lakhe lekhefu okanye ukwabelana ngezinto malunga nawe kunye nokwenza uxhulumaniso lwakho kwaye ubonise umntwana wakho ukuba uyamthanda kangakanani imihla ngemihla.
6. Batsho uxolo xa benza iimpazamo. Mhlawumbi ufundisa abantwana bakho ukuba babe ngabakho kwizinto abaziphosakeleyo baze baxolise kwaye bazame ukwenza oko benzayo.
Oku kunjalo, ukuba kungabalulekanga, ukuba abazali benze oko. Abazali abalungileyo bayazi ukuba bonke abazali bangenza amaphutha ngamanye amaxesha , kwaye bafunda kubo kwaye babonise abantwana babo indlela yokuthatha uxanduva kwizenzo zabo.
7. U qeqesho. Andikwazi ukuxinzelela oku ngokwaneleyo - ukuqeqeshwa (kungekhona isohlwayo) akuyona enye yezona zinto zilungileyo kakhulu onokuzifundisa abantwana bakho kodwa yindlela yokuqinisekisa ukuba ukhulisa umntwana oya kuvuya xa ekhula. Kutheni kubaluleke kakhulu ukuqeqesha abantwana ? Abantwana abangaqeqeshwayo banokuphanga, abanamdla, abanomdla , kwaye, akumangalisi, banenkathazo yokwenza abahlobo baze banandipha kamva ebomini.
8. Khangela oko umntwana akufunayo - kungekhona oko bafuna ukuba umntwana wabo abe okanye akwenze. Umntwana wakho unokuba ngumfundi onokuthula kunomntu ofuna ukuba yinkwenkwezi kwinqanaba okanye kwibala lebhola. Nangona kulungile ukukhuthaza abantwana ukuba bazame izinto ezinokuzikhupha ngaphandle kwimihlaba yazo yoduduzo ("Awukwazi ukuba uyayithanda uze uyenze ngokuqinisekileyo" ngamanye amaxesha ungasebenzisa, ngokukodwa kubantwana abasengqondweni ukuba ngubani kunye kunye noko bafuna), kubalulekile ukuba abazali benze isheke esheshayo kwaye baqinisekise ukuba abaxhasi abantwana ngenxa yezizathu ezifanelekileyo (ukuzama, kwaye kungekhona ngenxa yokuba umzali ufuna umntwana abe yinto a).
9. Yazi oko abantwana babo benzayo kunye nabo. Ngoobani abangabangane bomntwana wakho? Yintoni abazali bomntwana abathanda? Ngubani oza kuhlangana nomntwana wakho xa edlala endlwini yomngane, kwaye zikhona izibhamu ekhaya? Le mibuzo , kunye neminye imibuzo oyifunayo ngaphambi komhla wokudlala , ayilona luleke kakhulu ukhuseleko lomntwana wakho, kodwa yindlela ebalulekileyo ukuba ugcine umkhondo wento umntwana wakho ejongene nayo kunye nokuhlangana xa engekho kuwe.
10. Fundisa abantwana ukuba babe nobubele , bahloniphe abanye, bancede , banombulelo ngezinto abanazo, baze babe novelwano kwabanye. Ngokuqinisekileyo sonke sifuna ukuba abantwana bethu bazame ukufumana amabanga amahle; uzuze izibhengezo kunye nemigqaliselo yomculo, ezemidlalo kunye neminye imisebenzi; kwaye uphumelele kamva ebomini. Kodwa ukuba uyakhohlwa ukubafundisa indlela yokuba ngabantwana abalungileyo kunye nabantu abalungileyo, abayi kuba novuyo kwaye bazalisekise, kungakhathaliseki ukuba bafezekisa ntoni na izinto eziphumelelayo.
11. Khumbula ukuhleka kunye, uchithe ixesha kunye kunye nokudibanisa ngokufanelekileyo yonke imihla. Ingaba uhleli phantsi ukuze udlale umdlalo webhodi yokuzonwabisa , ukupheka, ukubukela ibhayisikobho okanye ukufunda incwadi enye kunye (okanye ukufunda iincwadi ezahlukeneyo icala, ukuba umntwana wakho usekhulile), abazali abahle sichitha ixesha ukwenza into ejabulisayo kunye nokudibanisa nezingane zabo kwiindlela ezincinci kunye ezinkulu kwimihla ngemihla.
12. Thetha uze uphulaphule. Ngokuqhelekileyo abazali bachitha ixesha elininzi kunye nezingane zabo zixoxa nabo kunokuba zibe nazo. Ziqhelise ukuphulaphula abantwana bakho kwaye ubanike ingqalelo ngokupheleleyo (ngaphandle kwikhompyutheni okanye ifowuni yesikrini). Uya kumangaliswa yindlela ovakalelwa ngayo xa unxulumene nomntwana wakho, kwaye uya kufunda malunga nezinto ezininzi umntwana wakho acinga nokuziva. Inxalenye engcono kakhulu: Uya kubonisa umntwana wakho ukuba unokukunika ingqalelo engacacile xa ufuna ukuxoxa naye.