Wonke umntu uyazi ubuncinane omnye: Umama onentsingiselo. I-monster yokupaka iindawo zokudlala, ii-school hallways, imidlalo yebhola kunye neqela leqela le-intanethi; kwaye wenza ubomi bomntu wonke bubuhlungu. UYE MOM oziva ulungile ukukhupha abanye ngokucacileyo uze uthumele imifanekiso kwi-Intanethi, ukusabalalisa amahemuhemu kunye nokugwaza abanye emva.
Utshabalalisa abantu kwiphepha lakhe le-Facebook, uhleba malunga nabavakalisi bakhe kwaye wenza amazwi athile angabonakaliyo malunga namanye amama angaphiliyo kwimilinganiselo yakhe.
Unokumgxeka omnye umama ngokufanelekileyo ebusweni bakhe, emthukuthelele yonke into ukususela ekunceliseni ukuzithobela.
Kungakhathaliseki ukuba iindlela zakhe, okanye isigidimi sakhe, akungabazeki ukuba ukhona. Kwaye uthetha. Nangona amaqhinga okuxhatshazwa asetyenziswayo ahlukahluka komama omnye ukuya kwelinye, aba bantu abadala bathetha ukuba amantombazana ahlala ejikeleze. Okubaluleke ngakumbi, ukunyuka kwamajelo asekuhlaleni, iingxoxo ze-intanethi kunye namaqela oluntu sele abanikeze amatsha amatsha kunye nezixhobo ezintsha. Ngenxa yoko, kubasetyhini abajoliswe yiloo mama enobungozi, kubonakale ngathi yingxaki ekhulayo, enye engabonakali ukubaleka.
Kutheni Abafazi Abakhulu Bamaxhala?
Abasetyhini abadala abaxhaphazela abanye benza njalo ngenxa yezizathu ezifanayo ukuba intsha ixhase abanye. Bafuna amandla, ngakumbi amandla asekuhlaleni. Kwaye bahlala besetyenziselwa ulwalamano njengesixhobo sabo sokhetho. Uhlobo lokuxhatshazwa lubuqili kwaye lulimaza. Kwaye kusebenza.
Enyanisweni, xa abaxhatshazwayo basebenzisa ubudlelwane babo ekudaleni umdlalo wezentlalo , baxhaphaza ngokohlobo lwentsebenziswano yabasetyhini.
Kwaye oku kwenza bazive beqinile kwaye belawula. Bakhetha ukuba ngubani na ongaphandle. Okwangoku, amaxhoba asele ebuza ukuba kwenzeke ntoni.
Abanye bathi iimama zibangelwa ngumona nomona . Bajika ngokuluhlaza xa umntwana womnye athola umklomelo okanye ukuqaphela ukuba umntwana wabo akayifumani.
Okanye, banqwenela ulwalamano lomnye umzali unenqununu, utitshala okanye umqeqeshi. Lo mkhwele ubakhokelela ukuba bazame ukunqumla omnye umama. Injongo yakhe kukuthatha okanye ukunciphisa oko omnye umama anakho.
Ngokuqhelekileyo, umama onomdla unenkxalabo enokuzivuyisa ngempumelelo yomnye umntu. Kwaye ukuba ngaba "ngabahlobo" kunye nomama onentsingiselo, kufuneka uqonde ngokukhawuleza ukuba oku akusihlobo oluhle . Kunoko, kunokwenzeka ukuba lobu buhlobo bubudlelwane obuyingozi kunye nomhlobo oyinyaniso .
Ungayiphendula njani kuMama Othethayo?
Xa uhlala ekupheleni kokufumana ukuhlaselwa komama onzima, kulula ukuqala ukungabaza. Ukuzithemba kwakho kungabandezeleka kwaye uziva uwedwa, udelelekile kwaye uhlazekile. Le miphumo ibuhlungu ngakumbi xa ubuye wucinga ukuba umxhaphazi ungumhlobo. Kodwa unetyala kuwe, nakwabantwana bakho, ukumelana nokuxhatshazwa . Nangona ukwenza njalo akulula ngaso sonke isikhathi, kuya kwenziwa. Nazi ezinye iindlela zokujongana noomama abanentsingiselo oyifumanayo.
Qaphela ukuba akusiyo kuwe . Awunayo ingxaki. Ngu. Ngoko ke uyeke ukuzigxeka ngokuxhatshazwa . Inokwenzeka ukuba, ukuxhatshazwa kwakhe kuvela kwindawo yokungakhuselekanga. Kukho into emangalisayo okanye eyingqinekile ngawe eqhuba ukwesaba nokuziva engakhuselekanga.
Mhlawumbi uziva esongelwa nguwe okanye wakho umntwana ngendlela ethile. Mhlawumbi unomona ngempumelelo yakho, indlu yakho okanye umtshato wakho. Ngubani owaziyo?
Isibalulekileyo akusikuthintela ukuxhatshazwa kwakhe. Akukho nto iphosakeleyo kuwe. Musa ukuchitha ixesha lakho uzama ukufumanisa oko kufuneka ukutshintsha okanye indlela yokwenza ube njengawe. Kwakhona, khumbula ukuba mhlawumbi akuyena yedwa okhethayo. Kwaye nangona kubonakala ngathi, akukho wonke umntu okholelwa kuye.
Hlalani nizolile . Ukuba kunokwenzeka, musa ukuphikisana nomama onentsingiselo. Ukuvakalelwa ngumsindo, ukucaphukisa okanye ukuthukuthela kwenza ukuba uxhatshazo lube lubi nakakhulu, ngakumbi xa ukuxhatshazwa kwikhompyutha.
Abaxhatshazi bavame ukuziva bexhotywe kwi-webhsayithi kuba bangafihla emva kwebhodibhodi. Ukusebenzisana nabo kuphela kubasa umlilo kwaye bahlala bechitha inzondo nangakumbi. Endaweni yoko, yomelela ngokumxhatshaza.
Khumbula, unokwenza ukhetho lokuxhatshazwa, kodwa unokhetho ekuphenduleni kwakhe. Kwaye, xa uhlala uxolo xa ubhekene nokuxhatshazwa, uthatha amandla akhe. Ngokuchaseneyo, ukuba uyamvumela ukuba abe phantsi kwesikhumba sakho, uya kuziva unamandla kwaye ulawulo ngenxa yoko. Kwaye, uya kuhlala ejolise kuwe kuba isebenza kuye. Abaxhaphazi bafuna ukuphendula. Qiniseka ukuba wenqaba ukumnika enye.
Mbizele ngaphandle . Ukudibanisa nomama onentsingiselo kwaye umxelele ukuba awuyi kuzinyamezela. Mxelele ukuba uhamba naye. Uyazi kakuhle oko akwenzayo kwaye awuyi kumela. Yiba nesigxina kodwa uhlonipheke. Kufuneka ubeke imida kunye naye, kodwa kufanele ube nenhlonipho ngokwenza njalo. Yaye ukuba uyasongela ukuguqula amanye amama kuwe, ungakhathazeki ngako. Ukuba ngaba abanye besifazane bazimisele ukuhlala kunye nohambo lwakhe olubalulekileyo ngaba ufuna ngokwenene ubomi bakho?
Mlungele ukuba aphendule kakubi. Uyakwazi ukugubungela amehlo akhe aze alahlekise uxanduva lokuxhatshazwa; Into ebalulekileyo kukuba uzivikela ekuhlaseleni kwakhe. Kwaye kuncinci, kunokumbuza ukuba ngaba akufanelekile ukukuhlasela okanye akunjalo. Kwakhona kubonisa ukuba awuyi kuthatha nje ukuyeka, ukuthetha ngokukhawuleza kunye nokubiza igama . Kungakhathaliseki impendulo yakhe, bambelele kwizibhamu zakho uze umbize ukuba ube yintetho. Iimbundulu zibala kumaxhoba asele. Qiniseka ukuba uyidumala kwaye uthetha.
Khetha iimfazwe zakho . Ngamanye amaxesha kulula ukunyanzelela umama onqabileyo. Ukuba uzama ukubandakanya naye phezu kwayo yonke into enokwenzayo, uya kuphelelwa amandla. Okungakumbi, unokuchitha ixesha elide uzama ukumemeza ngezenzo zakhe ezinentsingiselo kunokuba wenze kwizinto ezibalulekileyo.
Ngenxa yoko, qiniseka ukuba imeko iyafaneleka ukulwa kunye nomgudu ngaphambi kokuba ungene. Amaxesha amaninzi, xa umama abaxhaphazayo beyishiywe kumacebo abo, bazibhubhisa. Ekugqibeleni, abantu baya kubona ngokukhupha kwabo kunye nokunyanzelisa kwaye baya kuba nefuthe elingaphantsi kwexesha. Ngoko ube nomonde. Ukuphela kolawulo lwakhe kunokusondela ngakumbi kunokuba ucinga.
Yeka ekuboneni utshintsho . Abaxhatshazi bakhetha abanye ngenxa yokuba isebenza kubo. Ngenxa yoko, kunzima ukufumana umxhaphazi ukuba atshintshe , ngokukodwa xa bekhulile. Esikhundleni sokuzama ukufumana umama onentsingiselo ukubona impazamo yezindlela zakhe, gxininisa kwizinto ofuna ukuzenza kuzo. Ngokomzekelo, ngaba kufuneka uhlakulele okanye uhlaziye izakhono zakho zentlalo ? Ukuba kunjalo, gxininisa endaweni yoko.
Khumbula, ukuba umxhaphazi atshintshe, kufuneka akwazi ukuqonda ukuba oko akwenzileyo kulungile kwaye kukulimaza. Ngelishwa, abaninzi abantu abaxhaphazayo banelungelo lokuphatha abanye ngendlela abayenzayo. Ngaphezu koko, bahlala bengenalo uvelwano kunye neengqiqo zengqondo kwaye nje abakwazi ukufumana impembelelo yamagama nezenzo zabo kwabanye. Kungcono ukuba ugxile kwizinto olawula ngazo kunokuba uzame ukumenza atshintshe.
Yenza isitayela sakho somzali . Kukho iimbono ezininzi ngaphandle apho kukho umama omhle. Kodwa ekupheleni kosuku, akunandaba nokuba abanye bacinga ukuba wenzani. Kunoko, gxila kwizinto ezisebenzela wena, abantwana bakho nentsapho yakho. Yenza uphando lwakho malunga nobazali kunye nonina kwaye wenze oko kunengqiqo kuwe.
Okwangoku, ungagxininisi malunga noko abanye bacinga ukuba kufuneka uyenze. Ngokuqinisekileyo, musa ukumisela izinto ezingalindelekanga. Khumbula, akukho mama uphelele. Ngona umama onyanisekileyo phantsi kwesitrato akagqibekanga nantoni yokuba uzenza ngathi.
Ukuhlakulela iqela elitsha labahlobo bamama . Gcina ukhumbule ukuba amaqela kunye nemisebenzi ehleliweyo, njengamaqela okudlala kunye nee-PTO zidala ubudlelwane obunyanzelekileyo. Ngamanye amazwi, a mabhinqa kula maqela adibeneyo ngenxa yeqela kwaye akufuneki ukuba bafuna abahlobo. Ngaphezu koko, nabo banokuba ngumhlaba wokuzalanisa ii-clique kwaye bathetha umama. Nangona kukho amaxesha oza kufumana umhlobo okanye amabini kwiqela elinje, unokwenzeka nje ukuba ungene kwiiNtwana ezimbalwa zeeNtyana endleleni.
Kunoko, khangela ezinye iindlela zokuphuhlisa ubuhlobo obuhle kunye namanye amama ngaphandle kwala maqela. Ngamanye amaxesha oku kuqala kunye nawe uthatha isinyathelo sokuqala ukufikelela kunye nokwenza izicwangciso kunye nabanye abafazi oye wadibana nabo. Kwaye kunzima kunokwenzeka, gcinani engqondweni ukuba umntu kufuneka athathe isinyathelo sokuqala. Khawukhumbule ubuhlobo obunempilo abufuni ukuba lawa mabhinqa ayenobuntu bekopi. Endaweni yoko, khangela iimpawu zobunempilo ezinjengobunene novelwano endaweni yokuthanda izinto eziqhelekileyo.